Open Poetry #10 |
One Week. |
Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Morning, No recall of yesterday. Night, What went astray? Morning, Long wait for a call. Night, Moonlight, sounds of owls. Morning, Confusion filters the mind. Night, Did not know I was so blind. Morning, Tears, begin to flow. Night, Cold, so much sorrow. Morning, Regrets signs of despair. Night, Lonely now, no longer a pair. Morning, Please return, I'm so sorry! Night, Take away the roses, buddy! Morning, Hello,please! A lawyer, a voice. Night, My partner wants a divorce. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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© Copyright 2000 Daniel J D Ringuet - All Rights Reserved | |||
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I loved your method in this, Daniel...thought the format worked wonderfully! was like marking painful ex-es on a calendar....loved it! |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
This is one week I hope to never find in my day planner. Excellent format and wonderful verse from beginning to end (or should I say from morning to night) |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
Daniel, this is not a week I would like to live no matter how much I liked your poem. Dee |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
Nicely written Daniel..divorce must be the hardest thing to go through..if you can get thru it ..i guess you can get thru anything..... ~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
(((warm hugs))) you have penned your feelings drown with sadness, hope time will help you through this, Take care...Charisma |
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Serenity, Mark, Dee, Victoria, and Charisma, Let me just say, I am not going through a divorce. I wrote this, for a friend who never really cared much about his sweet wife, and when she stood up to him, he had nowhere to run. Thank you all for your kind words. Cheers Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
JD~ I sense that this is written for others so that they realize that sometimes you can dance But ... by golly, the piper will collect ! Nicely done. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
well came back....and noticed your message. and I am glad to hear that it's not your divorce, but your care and friendship is worth a lot. take care Charisma |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
'Morning, Regrets signs of despair. Night, Lonely now, no longer a pair.' Nicely written, Daniel! Unfortunately, far too many people find themselves in this situation - don't know what you've got till it's gone! (I can say I know a few.) I really liked it, my friend! Talk to you soon! sp Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'it might have been.' -John Greenleaf Whittier |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Daniel...this one hurt... |
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
Marge, Charisma, snowpants, and Paula, Thank you all for your replies. It often dawns on many people who lose a partner that they have made mistakes. Some acknowledge it some foolishly do not. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Daniel, I like the format you have used in this poem to express what is an awful period in your life. My best wishes to you Jon |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
daniel...it cuts like a knife. So sharp. you don't realize your pain until its too late. Ron |
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Daniel J D Senior Member
since 2000-10-01
Posts 1471Hillcrest, Queensland, Australia |
jncm, and Ron Thank you for your replies. Often times many of us forget that a relationship means the concern of two not one. Respond to my call and let the waves of my heart fill your life with the wonders of love (Daniel J D) |
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LoriJaye Junior Member
since 2000-10-23
Posts 34Massachusetts USA |
I liked the style - it conveyed the diminishment of hope well... Enjoyed! =) LJ "A smile is when your inner beauty comes outside." |
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