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Open Poetry #10
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Poetic Marriage(duet by Craig and PdV)
| Open Poetry #10 |
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Poetic Marriage(duet by Craig and PdV) |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Poetic Marriage Did you speak to me swine, wasn't listening you see Your words are like fly dung, they're useless to me. That doesn't surprise me, you not having the need Words must be superfluous to one who can't read. Birds fall from the trees and land in the street, While flowers drop dead from the smell of your feet. You drive me half-crazy with your inane patter On subjects obscure that I'm sure do not matter. With a drink in your hand, you're such a buffoon Holding court with the idiots in a downtown saloon. At least I have real friends not those in the park Who answer to whistles and talk with a bark. I hear what you're saying and I'd like to say thanks, For proving the likeness of you and these planks Although they are small - five feet and one quarter You're as thick as each other you're just slightly shorter. If you had any culture other than in your cheese You'd know life is more than just sports and TV's, Baywatch babes are not interested in you Unless you earn more than you currently do. You yell and you shout, I see your mouth open, Are you saying goodbye, I begin to start hoping. My mother warned me you would leave me some day Well the time is here now, let me show you the way. Come on now my dear, how many times must I ask? Before you remove that old Halloween mask. I'm sorry I swear that I never knew That isn't a mask it's just you! That perfume is nice, it suits you quite well Is it Eau de la toilet or Eau de canal? Neanderthal men were above you in smarts, At least they don't smell like stale beer and cheap tarts. With clairvoyant powers I can see what's ahead And there you are now, passed out in bed, With dreams of great hams and pies and cakes Now your belly will rumble, that's all it takes. Lets see now pigs manners piggy eyes please pray tell Have you got a pigs brain and trotters as well? I hear that you've got a hot date out tonight I hope you have fun and his guide dog doesn't bite They say that small children should be seen and not heard In your case I'd prefer both no sign and no word You sit there all night your head up your ass Go and get a job, see a movie, take a class Get a grip on reality; get with it; get real And while you're out getting get some sex appeal Oh please come out dancing please please pretty please I've never danced with a woman with bowlegs and fleas Well that's the name-calling bit pretty much done. Yeah it was good while it lasted a bundle of fun. I'm not sure that real married life is like this. Oh shut up you fool and just give me a kiss! [This message has been edited by Poet deVine (edited 09-24-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved | |||
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insect Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014 |
ROTFLMAO! [This message has been edited by insect (edited 09-24-2000).] |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
LOL, what a riot you two! Great work!  *Krista Knutson* "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart." -Confucious |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
ROFL  Hillarious, you two!Denise |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
ROFLMAO! You too really had me rollin! This is about what me and the hubby go through when we fight, (that's not often), but it gets much worse! LMBO! This was great! I had a hell of a good laugh! |
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CMGrimm Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685USA |
omg...lol did you two just take a snapshot of my wedding night or what?? lol that was great chris Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions. - ANON. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
I will never forgive my ex-wife for sending you a transcript of our marriage!!!!! Brilliant work, you two! Remind me not to tangle with either one of you!!!!  |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
ROTFLMAO!! Well...its similar anyway.  My name isn't Baby, and I don't want to cyber. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
sigh... SIGH... pretty close...except Craig speaks in complete sentences, with a lot less grunting! smiles, but wickedly funny and quite apt--sort of "who's afraid of Virgina Wolfe?"--well done......this one was fun, I bet! |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
This was the best laugh I've had in a long time Sorry it had to end Thank you both for a great poem How about a sequel??? Liz |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
In all innocence(Craig will kill me!) I must say this was SO hard for me to write. And SO easy for him!  Maybe it's because he is married and I'm not? Anyway, it was fun and maybe next time I can come up with some more zingers!  Thanks for reading! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
This should be hung...or at least, framed.... |
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Jenn E Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589Kelowna, BC, Canada |
ROTFLMAO to!!!!! Very good you two......very, very good.......What a way to spruce it up in here....... I gotta tell you, the visual I got from this was pretty intresting....lol Jenn E |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Sharon anytime you need some pointers just let me know!!  I'll help ya out |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Remind me to NEVER tangle with either one of you. This was supreme in it's entireity. Loved it. |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
LOL at Sunshine and WhtDove!! This should be hung. . . for a long time. . . somewhere. . . Well, it's really good anyway. . . just that. . . um. . . are you sure that the two of you aren't married to each other??  --------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Sharon and Craig, what a hilarious piece you have put together! Great work! LOL enjoyed it muchly! Maree |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Sharon and Craig- ROFL...I'm so glad I ran across this one today...too funny!! I love this. -vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, you have not truely met the poet." -vlraynes |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
A Passionate Classic for sure!!... |
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Victoria
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869 |
There is someone for everyone..haa..and you two are perfect for each other..haa.. loved it.. ~Victoria~ A poem is never finished, only abandoned. - Paul Valery (1871-1945) |
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