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Open Poetry #10
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--- Of Angels & Hearts --- (Marks Challenge, I think)
| Open Poetry #10 |
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--- Of Angels & Hearts --- (Marks Challenge, I think) |
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The Lonely Stranger Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 361Upstate, NY, USA |
She crept < !signature-->in through my open heart and robbed me of my world. She took my heart, she took my life, she took my little girl. There I rested, fast asleep, on the pillow of my trust. She took it all, so heartlessly, to quench her callous lust. I stood and screamed and yelled for help. "Look at what she's done !" They stared and scoffed and looked at me like I was the evil one ! I'd yelled so long, it seemed my voice would surely soon give way, And then I found a loving angel, one sunny autumn day. You sat, you smiled, and went to work, to fix this heart of mine. Patiently you set it right, one piece at a time. Take care, sweet, loving Angel p le as e, D ro p n ot my wounded heart, The slightest bump might cause it, Dear, to fall, again, apart Some men see things as they are and ask "WHY ?" I see things as they could be and ask "WHY NOT ?" [This message has been edited by The Lonely Stranger (edited 10-13-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Gerald H. Monroe - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jhonbus Junior Member
since 2000-10-12
Posts 25Sheffield UK |
Wow! Very good poem, and the heart shape is great! I like to play around with the shape of my poetry, as they say, a picture paints a thousand words. I was thinking of making one in the shape of a heart myself the other day. Excellent! |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
LonelyStranger~ This is marvelously done. The content is awesome and the format just adds to it. LOVE IT ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
very cool... that heart came out perfect great job ... and the poem was full of powerful emotions well done LS... very well done take care jm |
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Elizabeth Cor Senior Member
since 2000-10-13
Posts 879Over the river and through the woods |
So many picture-poems! I liked this visual especially. Stranger, I hope this was only a projection and not a true-life experience. If the latter is true, then I am glad to hear you have found someone who treats you as well as you deserve (Good Luck with this!). |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
WOW....just when I thought it couldn't get any better. Excellent poem and the graphic lends pefectly to the words contained in it. I say you get a "PERFECT 10" on this one. Thanks for the entry, they always make me smile!!! Yes, you met and you exceeded the challenge...no question!! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
This is so cool...LS---I really do need to quit goofing off and learn how to do this... Great Job. |
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The Lonely Stranger Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 361Upstate, NY, USA |
Jhonbus - Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment on my poem. I see by your post count, that you are a bit newer to Passions than I. If I have not welcomed you as of yet, let me take this opportunity. "Welcome new friend". Marge Tindal - I guess your signature is right, when ever I think my pen has run dry. Something or someone provides my next insiration. Thank you for your kind critique. Janet Marie - Thank you for having a peek and always feel free to tell me what you'd have done differently. I want to learn from the people here at Passions. Elizabeth Cor - Mark Bohanan gave us all the idea. It was a true life experience, but as the hands of time move along, they soften the blows life throws our way. I think they say...... "This too, shall pass" whomever "They" are. Mark Bohannan - Thank you for the copliment and even more thank you for the inspiration. You gave me the nerve to try something new with your challenge. serenity - Thank you, it was really fun to step out of the same old structure that makes me feel so secure. Give it a shot I was glad I did. [This message has been edited by The Lonely Stranger (edited 10-14-2000).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Y'know, everyone should take time to come back a week or so to see what they missed... and I'm glad I found this! Perfect response to a unique challenge...the "heart-break" look is awesome... well done, Sir! Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
You really did a great job with this! The poem and form are wonderful. I have a question (you can answer via email if you want). You've been here a long time. Almost from the beginning of Passions Forum. Why such infrequent visits? You have the talent - are you shy?  |
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The Lonely Stranger Member
since 1999-06-18
Posts 361Upstate, NY, USA |
Sunshine, I had thought this was a "dead-thread" I was surprised to see that someone had given it another read. Thank you for finding it and "having a read". I am so glad you enjoyed it. --------------------------------------------- Poet deVine, That's a very kind thing to say. I post rather infrequently because I usually onlt write a poem when something moves me to, some sort of inspiration. That combined with the fact that I don't like to post unless I have time to read the works of others leaves me not posting terribly often. I have posted much more of late as I have had more time to read others work. The reason that I don't always comment on others poems is because I don't always understand them, not because of any distaste. But if you see a comment by me on a given day, res assured I have read 2 or 3 screens of poems that day. Some men see things as they are and ask "WHY ?" I see things as they could be and ask "WHY NOT ?" |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
you have done a great job.....touched my heart with your poem....and gives it a visual form either.....you are a great Poet  Charisma |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Lonely Stranger- WOW...how did this one get by me? this is incredible! wonderful writing, and beautifully formatted. great job!! -vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, you have not truely met the poet." -vlraynes |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Wow ... you not only met, but you exceeded this challenge exceptionally well. Perfect presentation for these tender sentiments Lonely Stranger, and the verse contained in this heart is beautifully written! Best wishes, /Kit |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
TLS* This is stunning...content and format your heart shows not only on the page but in every well woven line~ |
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