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Open Poetry #7
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Revolution....of Sorts
| Open Poetry #7 |
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Revolution....of Sorts |
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bobbycat Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 233USA |
Revolution...of Sorts She calls to him. "Dinner's ready." He replies, as always. "Just a minute." Always busy, always working. Always one more minute. Something more important to do. Always. So they wait. And wait. And wait. And begin the meal without him. As she clears the table she can't help but wonder, "Is this all there is to life? Living for someone who doesn't even notice...?" As she scrubs the stovetop she can't help but ponder, "What good is this all doing? Clean home, clean children and nothing on the inside...?" Her furniture is polished daily Her countertops are germ-free Her floors are waxed and gleaming Her heart and soul are forever empty As she dries the dishes she can't help but realize, "I don't have to live this way! I deserve to be appreciated! My life is worth something!" As she clutches the wet glass she can't help but fume, "He's going to listen to me now! I have a voice, and this time, I'm going to use it!" The glass shatters in her hand She's oblivious to the pain She marches down the hall to him He won't ever ignore her again As she throws open the bedroom door she can't help but exclaim, "Look at me! Listen to me! Remember who I am? It's me--your personal doormat!" As he looks up from the computer she can't help but laugh, "But no more! I'm finished here! It's too late for you to finally notice me now!" She packs her bags, her children's, too Before he says a word A better life she will definitely find Her voice will now be heard As she slams the door behind them she can't help but wonder, "That was all a little too easy. He didn't say a thing. Why didn't he try to stop me...?" And then she wakes up from her dream. 4/27/00 |
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| © Copyright 2000 Christina L. Petrosky - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
wow. that's good stuff. it's topic hits home. We all got somethin' we need to atone for. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
wow, this hits way too close to home... very well thought out and written BC.. feeling taken for granted is one of the worst things. writing is such a perfect release. ~as always, Take Care,JM~ -------------- I know it's been a long road To get these towns behind me and I Will gladly reap what we may sow-- I am there for you ... and you're there for me ... Are you waiting for Heart in hand Woman and man See me where I stand I am Heart Heart in hand ~vertical horizon~ |
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bobbycat Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 233USA |
Ethan_Halo~ thank you very much for reading and commenting.  Janet~ I agree--being taken for granted IS a horrible thing. Thanks for your compliments; coming from you, they mean so much. Bobbycat =^..^= ~~ And it harm none, do what ye will.~~ |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
I was going to try to make a point here to stir you up a little. I can see, if this is about real life, sometimes its hard to tell with a persons poetry. You probably know the truth, you wrote about it. The guy in this story, should be woken up a bit, smash that glass or just be blunt. People to often become complacent with their life and forget about the other people in it for some reason. So wake him up with your feelings, if you love him, you might want to give that love an oppertunity for a second chance. If he doesn't wake up, make this dream a reality. One change I would suggest though is pack his stuff and tell him to get out the door. You have most of the responsibility taking care of the family, don't make it harder on yourself by walking away from everything you've built. Sometimes that seems easier for your emotions, but its probably harder for you life. In any case this was a wonderful poem, I really hope you resolve this. We all need inner happiness and to feel loved and cared about by the people we love. But we should never accept the alternative. I hope I haven't said anything here that offends you, not my intention. Parker |
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bobbycat Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 233USA |
Parker~ thank you for responding to this. Actually, this WAS based on a few real-life incidents; I have just added on to them for the poem, to make a point, I suppose. And you are exactly right about the walking away part....it would be easier for my emotions, but harder for my family. I have chosen to stay more than once, in order to work it out, but if it doesn't change soon, you know..... No, you haven't offened me by your comments; I actually appreciate them. Thank you for letting me ramble on in here, also. A listening ear is just what I need sometimes. Bobbycat =^..^= |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
This hit home, Bobbycat. I just wrote one a few days ago to Isis Challenge on loneliness ------and mine started almost the same way Dinner is Ready. These things ----just can't go on. I know what I did when this being taken for granted -- got me too mad -- I just didn't cook dinner --LOL I got noticed then. Wonderful poem! netswan |
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bobbycat Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 233USA |
netswan~ LOL about not cooking dinner...I may have to try that sometime!  And I just read your poem on Isis' challenge--very good stuff. Thanks for responding. Bobbycat =^..^= |
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