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Open Poetry #7
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First Poem Challenge.....untitled
| Open Poetry #7 |
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First Poem Challenge.....untitled |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! 
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Untitled How can I say "I love you?" then turn and walk away I know I once told you I would forever be true There would never be another my heart belonged to you But people change as time goes by This I cannot change Even when I hold her tight my love for you remains My first attempt at poetry when I was 18 somewhere around 1991 All my love, Jeffrey I lie awake in a world filled with dreams, but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jeffrey D. Carter - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
Good first poem, Jeffrey. Things can be so confusing, can't they? Elizabeth And this I say to you: why? Why? Just tell me why, so I can understand. Why? |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Very good, Jeffrey!  Denise |
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MagnoliaBlue Member
since 2000-05-12
Posts 367 |
Oh, there's always that first love, huh? Nice writing. MBlue |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
a great start Jeff, thanks for sharing. WOW 91 I still a babe just 10 or 11, seems like a life time ago. ------------------------ "I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else"-Richey Edwards "Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time". Baltimore Grotto "Libraries gave us power Then work came and made us free What price now for a shallow piece of dignity" Nicky Wire, A design for Life. manic street preachers La Tristesse Durera (Scream to a Sigh) "Life has been unfaithful And it all promised so so much I am a relic I am just a petrified cry Wheeled out once a year, a cenotaph souvenir The applause nails down my silence La tristesse durera Scream to a sigh, to a sigh I see liberals I am just a fashion accessory People send postcards And they all hope I'm feeling well I retreat into self-pity, it's so easy Where they patronise my misery La tristesse durera Scream to a sigh, to a sigh I sold my medal It paid a bill It sells at market stalls Parades Milan catwalks The sadness will never go Will never go away Baby it's here to stay |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I love this sweet little poem Jeff.. we love so intensly at that age and we think were never gonna feel like that again. very impressive first poem later jeff-gator jm There are places inside our souls ... that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts ... that need to be loved this much. ~Janet Marie~ "What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly" ~Lao Tze Tao~ ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
You were just too cute even then!!! Imagine some NC country girl, up and breaking your poor schoolboy heart! Marina |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Jeffrey, Nice work, my friend!! Some things just cannot be changed. LW Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end. --Michael W. Smith |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Ah, you were young and in love. Very good!! I like it.  |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Jeffrey~ Wonderful lines great first poem Love Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
What a sweet and sad first poem, Jeffrey. Well done -- ~netswan |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"Even when I hold her tight my love for you remains" Almost bittersweet Jeffrey ... ahhh to be young and in love ... wonderful first poem, and well done! Thanks so much for sharing this with us. Best wishes, /Kit |
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