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Open Poetry #7
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Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209


0 posted 2000-06-01 09:14 PM


ninety nine cents plus just
one more
the cost of a burger or fries or a drink
wendies value menu
your choice
for only one dollar
plus one nickle more
(he forgets about tax
and how I had to look under
the seat for five pennies more)
you not only stepped
into mistrust
you threw us
into reverse
lightspeed
a hamburger, for lunch?
(inquisition reins free)
but you took lunch today
(your eyes grew dark)
isn't that kind of strange?
(your eyes scream disbelief)

a hamburger yes!
(indignant am I)
and why not, just happened
by there was I
a dollar menu
a perfect bargain
for me
(food saved for tomorrow
makes perfect sense to me)
returned that skirt that fit
much too big
killed two birds with one
stone
or so I did think
(what does he think
not the lure of pickles
cheese and meat
but indiscreet lips
tempted me?)

words too sharp
quickly speed  into pain
(he's got to be kidding
I won't take this blame)
angry turn of my heel
silence the menu
now up for choosing
(you can order
up the anger
to go along side
but I wouldn't recommend it)

for the price of a burger
you threw
us
aside
(I shake my head and cry)




[This message has been edited by Corazon (edited 06-01-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 zoe d. - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
1 posted 2000-06-01 11:00 PM


Corazon, this one's a Whopper! (Next time, try a Big Mac!)
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

2 posted 2000-06-02 12:32 PM


Wow, Bal. That's almost as bad as that "battered" pun about cake and abusive relationships (I think Corazon wrote that one too).

Anyway, yo, Cor' (I admit, it's hard for me to think of a good nickname for you a la Buttefly Slippers or S'en), what's up? Your title alone hooked me, and then reading the contents kinda cinched it. Dry, sparse language with very bitter underpinnings. But a great poem nonetheless. Thanks for sharing it, and hope things look up for you soon.

Mike

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
3 posted 2000-06-02 11:03 AM


Corazon, great work here, says it like it is. You write great with strong emotion.

Parker

Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

4 posted 2000-06-02 03:40 PM


I know this was one wierd, but from the comments I guess it reads effectively...sigh.....thanks all  
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