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My First poem (challenge) Teatime War
| Open Poetry #7 |
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My First poem (challenge) Teatime War |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio 
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The Teatime War A spinster and her closest friend Her name unknown to me, Confided truths with the utmost trust Upon their noontime tea, Their cheeks they had grown sallow Their locks a deadened grey, Muscles sagged abundantly Upon that fine spring day, Now it may be due to season Or a smell upon the air, That wakened some nostalgia The facts are quite unclear. But alas they chatted secretly Of days so long ago, When eyes were bright and cheeks aflush With that youthful sort of glow, I know not why they argued As both seemed right to me, But alas they could not compromise Nor were they willing to concede. It seems the subject that on hand Aroused the long debate, Was something of a paradox Which to all of us relates, Love was the word that waged the war Between the two old dears, They spilled their treasures openly And sniffled back their tears, “You see,” said she named Ester “I knew not love could die, I thought it burned eternally” She cackled ‘neath the sky. “Beneath a waxing moon one night A summer long ago, A romance never meant to be Began slowly to unfold, I met him once, that’s all it took To bind my heart to his, Our eyes did meet, our hands did touch We sealed it with a kiss, The balmy night enfolded us The stars watched from above, The moon did glow romantically That’s how we fell in love, Within his arms I found myself I felt that I might swoon, But completely unbeknownst to me Twas’ the dark side of the moon, We spent out days together Too few they do seem now, Until at last it ended I can’t admit to knowing how, It was then that I did realize In the dark hours this truth I gained, A sourest lesson I ever learned A waxing moon must wane.” “Tsk. Tsk.” said she that listened close “I hate to disagree, But I find I have a problem With your love philosophy, It’s something there inside us Once ignited it’s set free, You can never take it back It lives eternally, I do not agree that love can die Here’s a story of my own, You’ll see once I have shared it I’ll drive my point right home...” “We grew up along the coast We courted near the sea, It was a match designed in heaven We were happy, him and me, The summer we had set the date His eyes would never see, Oh cruelest fate, you dealt the blow That took my love from me, He transcended up to heaven But within his heart was mine, Love was made to last forever To forsake it is a crime.” Now the argument got heated Each defending their own side, Of love and hate and broken hearts Between their words they cried, The debate went on ‘till midnight But the war was not yet done, They disagreed throughout their lives At teatime ‘neath the sun, One dear, she died that summer Her friend, the following one, But they never reached agreement Even when their day had come, Now some may choose one side While others disagree Many can’t decide But the answers clear to me, To each his own, think what you will But I feel that I must say, Wouldn’t you rather live your life Than wile it away? © Melissa Rose |
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| © Copyright 2000 Melissa - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
Poor old dears, indeed. What a lovely, well thought out composition. I can just picture them in the garden, having their disagreement. You brought them both to life. |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
With a start as great at this, Blondie, you can only become greater! Elizabeth "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!" -The Crucible |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
Thank you guys so much...this is actually my best poem, I think, that I have written and sadly enough it was my first  |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
This was wonderful Blondie! I loved the morale of your story. How long ago did you write this??? Your imagery and flow are superb ... I can still see these little ladies arguing it out under the sun! Lovely first poem, challenge met ... really terrific! Best wishes, /Kit [This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 06-01-2000).] |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
I just started writing poetry about 1 and 1/2 ago...this was my first one I ever wrote. Took me about 3 months to finally complete and put together... |
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