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Open Poetry #7
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Bottle Of Tears
| Open Poetry #7 |
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Bottle Of Tears |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration 
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Don't you bottle up your tears- The ones falling like rain. Please don't waste away in fear- Just let them soothe your pain. They're evidence of sorrow Of a hurt that's not gone away. If they're still there tomorrow, They'll just leave another day. For we need our tears each one To purge and to finally heal. When we cry them we re-run, The memories we still feel. And it's best to let them flow, Let them wash away our past. Dam them and you'll ever know, A pain which will last and last. |
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| © Copyright 2000 C.G. Ward - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Well said!!! I like... |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Chris, your style could never be referred to as "standard" with any degree of accuracy...and this piece is wonderfully written, standard or no. Your message rings fast and true with the peeling bells of wisdom. ~ Claire |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Christoper--I loved this--give me a shot of this "non-style" of yours, straight up--anytime...sincerety all lovely-like.... |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Hi Chris, I am fairly new here and have not read any of your other poems. But standard? This is high and very well done. I am a freestyler, writing what I feel, and regardless of meters, and measurements, to this style is well met. netswan |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
maybe the tears fall down for a reason, to cover every part that's hurting and I felt that with this one. Kathleen |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Yep, you got it right with this one, Chris. Cry it out as fast as you can - that way you can get srewed over again all that much faster too and start on the next bottle. Just joking, bud. You know me. Your point is valid and well reflected. Much easier said, though, than done it would seem. Michael |
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mariee66 Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596Recess, OfYourMind |
Even though this is not your "standard" style, it's very nicely done. Marie~ |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
I'm tending to agree with Michael on this, 'tis easier said than done. (whooo boy, though once the floodgates are open with me then watch out cause I'm liable to never stop!! LOL) Quite a simple, but oft overlooked and wise message you've relayed m'friend. May I never be too busy to help another's load, Then I'll be drinking from the saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed. --Author Unknown |
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Irie Senior Member
since 1999-12-01
Posts 1493Washington State |
Hey Christopher...I haven't been around for a while so I haven't read any of your work until now. I guess I need to go read some of you other poetry to see what your "Standard" style is. Anyway, I think this is great, and love what stands behind it! Off to read more of your work. ~Sheri |
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dhuron Member
since 2000-03-19
Posts 476 |
Excellent Work Here Chris. Powerful message, now if only everyone will listen. The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, not the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship." --Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
Beautiful poem here Christopher.  I loved it, and the message is excellent and true. |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Christopher....This is probably my first reply to your work, though I have read much of it while I have been here. I find it all to be of a high standard. I like the message in this one, and in my opinon if you get the message across you have succeeded. A round about way of saying I like!Not all those who wander are lost. ~J.R.R. Tolkien |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
Just replying to let you know that I intend to take a bash at it, but I don't have time right at the moment -- I'll send you the URL when I post it hun! And you're right, this IS a good idea -- and my guess is, YOU could have done better with it had you put a little more effort into it -- tsk tsk ... LOL --Me Full fathom five thy father lies, Of his bones are coral made, Those are pearls that were his eyes; Nothing of him that doth fade But doth suffer a sea-change Into something rich and strange... --William Shakespeare, from The Tempest |
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Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
Presentation is in the eye of the beholder and my eye likes what it sees. Nice writing. |
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Cassanova Junior Member
since 2000-04-12
Posts 39Turlock, Ca. |
I have to agree with Skyfyre on both counts Chris: This is a great idea, and you could have done better had you really tried. (shaking head) Jason |
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hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Christopher - don't change a thing! It's great, just the way it is, and no-one but the creator has a right to criticize the creation. Keep writing - you have a gift!  Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Chris, I think the poem was wonderful and you got your point across perfectly, enjoyed the read very much. Thank you, Cerenity [This message has been edited by Cerenity-1 (edited 04-21-2000).] |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
I'm definitely one who lets those tears fall...its when I don't cry that things get bad. So, I understand this way of thinking completely! Lovely work Chris, and I agree with the others, your work is never 'standard'. *Krista Knutson* As soon as man does not take his existence for granted, but beholds it as something unfathomably mysterious, thought begins. ~*Albert Schweitzer*~ |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
How beautiful this is! Corinne |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Well now!  How does one respond to something like this??? I honestly believed that this really...well, sucked! I think it could be done MUCH better. And Kess, I will try! Thank you my friends, for your support of even my crap! |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
"Don't bottle up your tears... just let them soothe your pain." Very soothing words..I enjoyed this style of writing...I don't think someone always has to write in the same precise style...I think that would be called a comfort zone. James |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Ah heck, Chris, We've been puttin up with your crap since last August, didn't expect us to abandon you now did you? Here, have a Kleanex!!!  I'd be crying too if I wrote this.Michael |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Christopher, you call this crap? You've got it wrong...this is excellent crap !!! no seriously this is excellent and a fine message too. What comes from the heart goes to the heart. Samuel Coleridge |
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