Open Poetry #7 |
Hiya, ppl! Here's a poem |
Lily121 Junior Member
since 2000-05-23
Posts 24 |
Hiya, people. I'm new, but I already have a poem to submit. Here 'tis: (never mind the spelling) When I sit upon the rocky crags of Isreal, I watch the sandy dunes and flapping hawks above. And if I turn into the rosy glare of the newly fallen sun, I can lok upon the old crumbling walls of Jerusalem. Jerusalem, Jerusalem, a holy star among the rest, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, its makers long gone and dead, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you are strong and true, still standing to this day on the sandy dunes. O when the nomads came to the land of Isreal, they sighted Jericho, and so they then commenced to attack, in the setting sun. They fought the city for many days, but finally the walls did fall, and Jericho was won. And so these people spread and conquered, and become known as Jews, and they ruled over Isreal like wealthy kings. The Jews then built a capital on the sandy dunes, and Jerusalem was made. O Jersusalem was strongly built, for one surely knows that it still stands on the sandy dunes of Isreal. Jerusalem, Jerusalem, a holy star among the rest, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, its makers long gone and dead, Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you are strong and true, still standing to this day on the sandy dunes. There 'tis. |
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© Copyright 2000 Lily121 - All Rights Reserved | |||
netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Welcome to Passions, Lily121! Wow, what a great rhymetic poem and a tribute to Jerusalem and lovely imagery ~netswan |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Sounds like a ballad to Jerusalem. Have youb thought about putting your words to music, seriously. great poem. ------------------------ "Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? " Douglas Adams. "Here chewing your tail is joy" Richey Edwards "Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time". Baltimore Grotto |
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Lily121 Junior Member
since 2000-05-23
Posts 24 |
Wow! Glad you liked it. I mean, I'm just a kid and I can write poetry. Very glad you liked it, thanx for the support! |
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Lorraine Nisbet Member
since 2000-05-18
Posts 218Jersey City, NJ USA |
Hiya, Lily121 Here's more support coming your way. Good imagery, good job. Hope to hear from you soon. Welcome! ~Lorraine |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Lily~ Well, young lady .. you've done quite a remarkable piece here. Enjoyed it very much. 'Just a kid', huh ? Well, I say .. 'Way to go kiddo !' Welcome to the friendship circle here at Passion's. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Lily, welcome to the family! Please check your email for a special welcome. |
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