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Open Poetry #7
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Twice bitten
| Open Poetry #7 |
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Twice bitten |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap 
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Alone with my thoughts, I cannot but wonder What peril resides in this spell that I’m under -- What price shall demand, what pride there forsaken -- What more might expect, when so easily taken? So tragic the hope, so painful the dreaming, Precarious, sifting the truth from the seeming! How much is too much -- or ‘tis better too little? Unanswered, they rage -- and I’m caught in the middle ... The tears will not come -- I’ve named them forbidden -- What I cannot control, I can choose to keep hidden; So perfect the smile, let no censor decry it: Though the fortress may fall, I shall only deny it. Though wonder is past, there is peace in the knowing; But ‘tis puzzling to sip when your cup’s overflowing ... The choices are plain: to wait, or surrender: To take up the blade, and resume heart’s defender. I cannot but fail, for all of my trying: I smother the ember for fear of its dying; For excess in giving, I suffer receiving -- So much, swiftly offered -- too much for believing. This tale has no end -- I write no conclusion -- Unless there is aught to be found in confusion; Unwilling to leave, twice bitten for staying, Oh I would there were rules for this game we are playing! Full fathom five thy father lies, Of his bones are coral made, Those are pearls that were his eyes; Nothing of him that doth fade But doth suffer a sea-change Into something rich and strange... --William Shakespeare, from The Tempest |
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| © Copyright 2000 Linda Anderson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
beautifully written sky such finese such style and that darn song of twice bitten twice shy rings in my ears. hugs to you in what I feel is much written pain ouch netswan |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Nice one Kess - and nice to see you again - I know you're busy, so I appreciate the time you can spend with us... This is a wonderful deviation from your normal iambic mindset.. It's very well written, and equally as intense... Keep smiling..  |
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REBECCA ALLYN Member
since 2000-05-09
Posts 91Lima,Ohio |
Very nice work!!! I really like your writing perfect!! LOTS of LUV, Becky |
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David2 Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 407 |
It is truly a shame that it is a game we play instead of an open and honest exchange of ideas mixed with love. Great poem, Skyfyre! David2  |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
Powerful with a hint of anger in it....Bravissimo! This thing really "bled" it's way down the screen, you used some mighty powerful phrases in there! WOW, is all I can say! You GO girl!  |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Just excellent writing, Kess! It is so good to see you again! Denise |
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Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
You certainly have a talent for expressive writing. The rhyme is married so well in this piece. A unique departure from you usual style. Excellent writing as always! dh A life isn't significant except for its impact on other lives. |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Alas, a mirrored image of feelings I now read on screen .. This poem you write portrays the shape of one's heart so well. Thank you for the sharing. CocoBaci |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Kess, I was glad to see your byline ~ I always look forward to reading your work, you know. This is a beautiful, somewhat bitter piece of writing...just my cup o' tea! Take care, ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The tears will not come -- I’ve named them forbidden -- What I cannot control, I can choose to keep hidden; So perfect the smile, let no censor decry it: Though the fortress may fall, I shall only deny it. ---------------- I cannot but fail, for all of my trying: I smother the ember for fear of its dying; For excess in giving, I suffer receiving -- So much, swiftly offered -- too much for believing. This tale has no end -- I write no conclusion -- Unless there is aught to be found in confusion; Unwilling to leave, twice bitten for staying, Oh I would there were rules for this game we are playing --------------- *sigh* (of complacency) but Kess...Im SO good at getting bitten twice Ive had so much pratice *smile* holding up those mirrors again... tis scary indeed  this poem is exceptional... if ya find those rules...E-mail me a copy... not that I'll play by them...*S* take care, jm It's amazing How you make your face just like a wall How you take your heart and turn it off How I turn my head and you lose it all ... And it's unnerving How one move just puts me by myself There you go just trusting someone else Now I know I put us both through hell ... I'm not sayin That there was nothing wrong I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me And I'm not sayin We ever had the right to hold on I just didn't wanna let you get away from me. ~MB20~Leave |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
So much I could say here on a personal level, Kess. I will simply and an "I know" and add a *sigh*. From a poetic standpoint this was very strong - poignant all the way through and with excellent word choice. "This tale has no end -- I write no conclusion -- Unless there is aught to be found in confusion;" I love it. Michael |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Kess, I can see now why you are not in the mood for my bliss today. . . I can feel the bitterness and the confusion in this one. . . and I can relate to the last line, there are rules, but no one can remember them because they keep changing. . . And yes, I did also notice that this was not in your usual iambic rhythm. . .that's why I read it aloud. . .the rhythm fits the words well and adds to the feelings of confusion. . . -------------------------------------------------------------- That which gives light must endure burning --Victor Frankl |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
Hello everyone ... netswan: Thanks for the sympathy and the reply ... you know, I never did like that song ... Nan: Not sure whether that's a sincere comment or a veiled chastisment -- LOL. Either way, thanks, and I'll try to get back as often as possible ... Rebecca: Thanks dear, glad you enjoyed. David: Such is reality. It's seldom pretty ... thanks for reading. Femme: Yes, well -- 'twas a mood -- I'll leave it at that. Thanks for the compliment. Denise: Thanks hun -- glad to be able to visit. Danny: You're too kind -- but hey, I'm not going to argue ... Coco: Welcome, and thanks right back atcha. Claire: Always enjoy your replies and your work ... thanks for reading. JM: So that was YOU I saw in the mirror -- nearly gave me a heart attack, girl! Does this mean I have to stop sleeping naked..? Michael: Tell me about it ... Sven: If you find some sort of method to this madness, please feel free to forward it ... Smooches all, --Kess |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Your expression is wonderful in this Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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