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Open Poetry #7
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save me from myself (or whatever's dragging me down)
| Open Poetry #7 |
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save me from myself (or whatever's dragging me down) |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Plink, plink. The sound of tears? The plucking of guitar strings? The rain just starting or stopping? I don't recognize the sound Or the silence it brings. One girl up on a cloud, Contemplating ending her life. Another out in Azusa, Coming back into mine like a knife. How do I stop the gentle flow Of unnatural rhythms and verse and Save myself from myself? Whatever is dragging me down Has a clawed grip that, each second, Seems less like pain and more like breathing, More like every second before the claw tore me apart. Did I say the flow is gentle? It's not. It's the pulse of spilling blood, A cranberry stain around my head Fallen backward against the floor again. The claw wrote something in my back. One girl said "You can't help me." The other said "I don't want you." Both rejecting love. How very ladylike. Primrose and poppies wilt and sop in The mess they made of what I gave them And what they gave me. Camellia petals Broken free, ladyslipper crushed, Bleeding hearts gush seeds, Asters and irises outlining stars. Ha -- let's see those flower bits Just try to kiss away these scars. Watch me disappear, I fear. Watch me go further into myself. There is nothing no one can do And I might as well watch, With a wealth of misbegotten jaded humor; Claws and all. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Normally I do not even try to play favorite lines with you---too many to count---but on a personal level--"just try to kiss away these scars..." Ouch. Mercy Master. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I don't recognize the sound Or the silence it brings. One girl up on a cloud, Contemplating ending her life. Another out in Azusa, Coming back into mine like a knife. How do I stop the gentle flow Of unnatural rhythms and verse and Save myself from myself? Whatever is dragging me down Has a clawed grip that, each second, Seems less like pain and more like breathing, ----------------- One girl said "You can't help me." The other said "I don't want you." Both rejecting love. -------------------- Just try to kiss away these scars. Watch me disappear, I fear. Watch me go further into myself. There is nothing no one can do And I might as well watch, ------------------- hey, you ok mike? "Seems less like pain and more like breathing," yea...it feels like this sometimes... when you hurt for so long... it does just become second skin, dont it... lots of powerful lines in this one bsq... and lots to read in between them too... its a bad habit of mine, (ask Michael) *smile* dont go too far inside your self... I would miss ya... take care, please. jm/bs It's amazing How you make your face just like a wall How you take your heart and turn it off How I turn my head and you lose it all ... And it's unnerving How one move just puts me by myself There you go just trusting someone else Now I know I put us both through hell ... I'm not sayin That there was nothing wrong I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me And I'm not sayin We ever had the right to hold on I just didn't wanna let you get away from me. ~MB20~Leave |
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mete out Member
since 2000-02-16
Posts 270england |
***bsquirrel, every poem i read of yours hits me harder thatn the last... this one punched me slapped me and throew me to the floor..what a fantastic ride. it must have hurt to write this but ...wow.  [This message has been edited by mete out (edited 05-08-2000).] |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Grateful are the poets who can unleash their feelings on paper before we become lost. You have done this well bsquirrel ... I hope you can find some happiness amongst the thorns. Take care, /Kit [This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 05-08-2000).] |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
well I have that same "claw", so you know I understand your poetry....excellent writing and yes, I will echo kit...I hope your writing helps you heal...big hugs my friend |
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Rosebud1229 Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813North Carolina |
Bsquirrel, very touching and moving. I loved the lines -seens less like pain,and more like breathing and save myself from myself? I can relate to how your feeling sometimes even when you just want away from it all a bad situation something seems to draw you in even deeper and you know if you would just let go things would get better. That is the truth though when we know sometimes we are our own worse enemy that brings us down. That claws away at the scar that already has run so deep. Sometimes I guess it's just human to want the pain even though it runs so deep. Loved it very much that you could open up so completely. |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thanks for all the kind words, guys (gals). I'll do my best to answer each one personally: 's', You learn well, grasshoppah. But mercy is not a game we pay, it is a pain we pray. Yes, that made no sense. Ooohm. (gong sound) Butterfly Slippers, I'm feeling loads better tonight. Let's just say I was really ill-equipped to handle what went down last night, and I stupidly tried to say "Okay, there's nothing you can do; just let it out of your head" which thereby increased the pressure 10 times worse. I'm starting to learn, in my old age, that when something sad or tragic happens, you shouldn't run away from it, but embrace it and let it be part of you. And no, I didn't figure that out all by myself -- remmeber, I'm only 23.  mete out, I laughed when I read your description of how my work affects you. Didn't know I was such a boxer! Seriously though, glad you enjoyed.Kit, Thanks for the good wishes. And I have, I have. Corazon, Thank you. (hug back) Here's to quick expedience of understanding how to handle your problems, too. Rosebud, Yeah, I definitely do open up completely -- which is good (for me) and sometimes bad (for the reader). But I don't apologize. In fact, I'll just smile. And what you say is very true. I think we like to cause our own pain so we don't have to deal with the pain that comes unexpectedly from some other source. The big problem with this plan, of course, is you're miserable all the time. Nuts to that! (ooo, squirrely pun) Mike |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
glad you feeling better...ya worry me now and then *smile*... and as for your lessons learned... wise beyond your years my poet squirrel...  say goodnight butterfly slippers... goodnight BSQ...sweet dreams jm |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
I love the strength in this poem, Mikey... ~Tier "I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..." |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
JM, thanks you -- even though I just replied two years late! Tiersdin, I'm glad these are only bones of mine, and not blood of heart. Mike |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
Geez! There you go again! |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Wow, I never realized before how much my reply to Tiersdin is a poem. Thanks, PS. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Godilovethispoem. |
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