Loves Token an attempt at a tanka

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Annie78
Member

since 2003-10-03

Posts 469
here then there then back here

0 posted 2005-05-03 09:13 PM

Loves Token

in the night he came
speaking with loves refrain
words softly spoken
someones heart will get broken
he unbecomes her token
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Annie Burt
05/03/05
(all rights reserved)

there is but a short time to exist, love,laugh,live and never stop believing in miracles

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 2005-05-04 11:25 AM

Annie~

And with stroke of pen
Tanka form speaks for the heart
Having known the pain
Of heart in break of the night
Sometimes, all things will come right~

Girlie girl ... you nailed the form perfectly~

This is lovely and I appreciate knowing that you gave it a try~

*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

Email [email protected]

Tramp Poet
Senior Member

since 2000-01-06

Posts 754
Could Be Anywhere...

2 posted 2005-05-04 11:28 AM

love token? lol affirmative action gone very, very wrong? provocative piece, well done.

"If you give a man a fire, he's warm for a night; if you set a man on fire, he's warm for the rest of his life."
author unknown

Annie78
Member

since 2003-10-03

Posts 469
here then there then back here

3 posted 2005-05-04 01:10 PM

thank you marge....surprised me how it just came with such ease on this one. i am overjoyed to hear your praise....and the tanka comment thrills me.....tanka, tanka very much
Annie

there is but a short time to exist, love,laugh,live and never stop believing in miracles

Annie78
Member

since 2003-10-03

Posts 469
here then there then back here

4 posted 2005-05-04 01:12 PM

tramp you still know how to make my heart sing....thank you for the kind words
Annie

there is but a short time to exist, love,laugh,live and never stop believing in miracles

Joyce Johnson

Member Rara Avis

since 2001-03-10

Posts 9912
Washington State

5 posted 2005-05-04 02:22 PM

Good job. Joyce

Annie78
Member

since 2003-10-03

Posts 469
here then there then back here

6 posted 2005-05-04 05:22 PM

thank you joyce....this was a fun learning lesson
Annie

there is but a short time to exist, love,laugh,live and never stop believing in miracles

pegasus111
Member Elite

since 2000-07-27

Posts 2219
ocala, fl, usa

7 posted 2005-05-04 06:55 PM

The night denies truth
deception is cloaked in grey
be still foolish heart
wounds heal faster in the light
in time all such pain will pass

the woods are lovely, dark, and deep, but I have promises to keep, and many miles to go before I sleep...Frost

Annie78
Member

since 2003-10-03

Posts 469
here then there then back here

8 posted 2005-05-04 08:29 PM

pegasus....wonderful tanka comment, thank you
Annie

there is but a short time to exist, love,laugh,live and never stop believing in miracles

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