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Open Poetry #8
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Blindly Driven
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Blindly Driven |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven 
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Blindly Driven sighted and unseeing blindness unconcerned apathetic chaos evolves into destruction impinging brightness anxiety fills the night rolling oblivion then visuality restored angry winds surround spreading trepidation though silent relief swells in their wake future becomes past creeping rapidly by transient shadows dispersing in haze the timeless anticipations long sweated details now immature memories evaporating in sequential blurs until next a wanderer some heedless passerby fails to see the danger inherited with listless eyes thanks to Kamle for her tutorial in free verse and her patient help. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
WOW extraordinary work, Jamie.... let me congratulate you on this peach of a poem (is that expression still valid by the way???) seriously loved the stunning imagery here... regards, sudhir |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Jamie... This is beautifully written as only you can do, with 'insight', (no pun intended!), and images that reach out. Great style that you have!! ~~ To Live is to Give ~~ |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
Fantastic writing Jamie. You have a talent indeed. Marina It is a blessing to have wings for words, and passion in pen Marina Crossley |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Wonderful powerful images and intense thoughts! I enjoyed it very much...good writing! |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
If this is a first venture into free verse Jamie ... I hope there will be many more! Exceptional writing ... just wonderful!  Best wishes, /Kit |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I like this very much. What I enjoy most about this form is that we can all see something different in it. Truly, everyman's poem. Great job, sir!  |
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Tanga Junior Member
since 2000-07-02
Posts 39BC Canada |
I sit here in quiet comtemplation as the tears slowly trickle down my cheeks. I have awoken from my deep slumber and my blinded eyes can now see hope that thou has penned within your poem. I humbly bow down and bend my head and give thanks to the wanderer of words who is stepping out of grief's storm and going into the light of life. What an wonderful word wonderer you are. The blind leading the blind! Inciteful. Hugss <**> |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
the timeless anticipations long sweated details now immature memories evaporating in sequential blurs until next a wanderer some heedless passerby fails to see the danger inherited with listless eyes --------------------- jamie this is excellent, very cool poem, cryptic feel to it... very unique vocabulary choices as well take care, jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
a little of the mark there Tanga...lol.. Janet Marie- Thanks,, Kamle made me loosen it up alot...hehe...< !signature--> Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". [This message has been edited by Prometheus (edited 07-31-2000).] |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Jamie...hey brown eyes this is splendid dark and brooding |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Prometheus, This was awesome writing!!!! Loved the new style very much!!! Looking forward to more. LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Jamie, this is excellent, you have done a wonderful job here enjoyed it muchly |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Paula-- How you make these brown eyes shine...you are just so nice... thanks lone wolf-- thanks a lot... it may be some time before i do that style again....Hard!...lol Maree--- Thanks so much,,, I am very glad you enjoyed it,,(maybe it was the Kamla influence..lol) Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Well dear J - it all paid off - all those (literally) hours...lol This ROCKS! Not 'stiff' at all..ROTF... proud of you my friend for your foray...and we must do it again soon ok? Hugs K |
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