Open Poetry #8 |
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Within Your Words |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song ![]() |
Within Your Words Within your words... I travel the depths of your soul As I stumble across a broken heart I think to myself... I can relate to that Within you words... I am given a poet's dreams Rainbows and Oceans, and pots of gold Given over to grace I say... I can accept your gift Within you words... I watch as true love blossoms Dancing eyes and picnic lunches I yell out in glee... I rejoice in your love Within your words... I live a fantasy and fairytale Twisting the visions to become my own So I shed a happy tear... For I've just been touched Within your words... I may never really know The pain or torment nor the joy encased Though you share a little I know there is much more hidden Mark Bohannan **a little different style for me. Hope it works! |
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© Copyright 2000 Mark Bohannan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Walter Poe Senior Member
since 1999-10-13
Posts 787 |
Words are the source of all after all In the begining there was a word Oh Danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling From glen to glen, and down the mountain side The summer's gone, and all the roses falling 'Tis |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
it works... and works beautifully yes...the true magic of poetry is the gifts we find with-in the words of all the emotions and graceful images we discover here each day. lovely tribute to poetry Mark. later-fellow-poetry-worshiper-gator ![]() jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
another winner here, Mark ... the repetitive first line works well since all the subsequent lines in each stanza are so divergent (maybe that should be left for the "Critical" board?) ... great read ... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
It works! It works! Within your words I see a tender spirit that listens. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
It works for me too..this is really good Mark... |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Walter-you are so right and it amazes me still the power simple words can have. JM-glad it works for you and Yes I worship poetry( A TAD)LOL MA-thanks for the read and so glad ou enjoyed it. Martie-I do my best but you can never really be sure. serenity-thank you once again to your responses |
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Trew Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Ottawa, Canada |
Oh ya, that worked. Even those inspired enough to attempt to put their emotions into words very rarely are capable of handing out more than a glimpse. You wrote a great one here! |
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MMoonchild Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715PA |
Beautiful, Mark...repetition in poetry gets the feeling and depth across.. I use it often..and this was so nice..not knowing your previous style... ~~soft smiles Maureen You Give To Me you give to me the morning sun to pocket in my heart to carry 'til the nighttime calls in sleep, warmth to impart you give to me the simplest smile though not so simple 'cause when e'er your face appears to me my heatbeat seems to pause you give to me the coupon that says "love you ever more" no date of expiration there "forever" words so pure and when you whisper on the wind the sounds of feelings true you give to me the best there is for what you give is "you". M 2k |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Trew-thank you. This was for a special friend. Maureen-Thank you for the beautiful poem. A better reply than the gift of poetry does not exist. ![]() ![]() ![]() |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Mark* This poem is absolutely perfect. Poetry whether it be our own or someone elses allows us to travel to a place within that perhaps we wouldn't otherwise look at or feel. When we stumble upon those poems or poets that seem to speak from our own hearts and souls......well there's nothing more beautiful. |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
It is the beauty of your words that I so often travel and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me those travels. I know that you for one really do see the perils of the travels and the misguided tours that often take place. |
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A Romantic Heart Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496Forever In Your Heart |
Mark, within your words I feel your heart speaking loud volumes...of longing for true love and dreams come true! ![]() I like to read them! |
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JulieAnn Senior Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 754Earth 3rd Rock from the sun!! |
This reminds me a bit of everything I feel about passions.....stumbling through these pages filled with everyone baring their souls....we relate to some.....feel sorrow for others.....I think this would be a great tribute to passions!! However i do not know what YOUR meaning was behind it.....Just a thought.....Liked it alot....Second favorite?????? ![]() Julie :) |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Mark, I think you did a fine job here. Much meaning in these words. I could feel the emotions coming out. Nice writing. LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
RH-As I like to read yours. Thanks for the read and your kindness. JulieAnn-You are on the right track and I do so love to read all the wonderful poems here. The problem is finding enough time to read and reply to as many as I want to.Thanks to you. LW-Thank you so much. I have a true passion for poetry and the emotions are MOSTLY for that the rest are for a someone who sees something the way I do for the most part. Glad you enjoyed it and thank you for the read and compliment. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Mark...the depth and imagery in this poem is superb..twisting the visions to become my own.... never say never |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
AH there's still a mystery within the words, that makes the poem even more enchanting. Keep learning about the person and finding something delightful makes the road to true love easier to travel....... Great poem Mark, I really enjoyed. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Mark, I appreciate the sentiment a lot! Within us all there is so much to say...some can, some cannot... you have done that well here... Sunny ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Mark, Believe me, it works This is a wonderful poem with the title pleasantly carried through the poem. A very enjoyable poem Liz |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Paula-twist away.Thank you for the superb. ethome-don't you just love a great mystery? ![]() Sunshine-Thank you so much. Liz-so happy that you found it to work. Thanks ![]() |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
MarkB~ Within your words a sigh softly fell upon my heart's need. I find an embracing comfort within the tender words I read. You ask me 'Does it work ?' I reply to you ... "If it ain't broke - don't fix it !" Tenderly your words woo ! Smiling here ! ![]() Thank you. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"Within your words", you have painted such a beautiful picture of the many feelings and emotions expressed, written and read in these walls daily. Absolutely beautiful Mark ... this flows just wonderfully! ![]() Best wishes, /Kit |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Marge-you have made my day. Thank you so much. ![]() Kit-That means more to me than you will ever know and I thank you dearly. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Mark, it works...exceptionally so. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Claire- Thank you so much. It is sort of a tribute to all the poets here. |
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Holly Member
since 2000-05-12
Posts 127Arkansas |
Mark- How sweetly done this piece is. I like it! ![]() love & all, -Holly I know well what I am fleeing from but not what I am in search of. Michel de Montaigne |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Holly- glad you liked it. Thanks for the read. |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
I have no idea how I missed this one Mark. I am glad that I found it though! Excellent writing once again my friend!! Marina It is a blessing to have wings for words, and passion in pen Marina Crossley |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Marina- things go by so fast here as of late that it is almost impossible to keep up.LOL I do appreciate your comments and I thank you so much. ![]() |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Mark, Just wonderful, I love this so much, thanks for posting it. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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Lynne Dale Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 114Melbourne Victoria |
Mark I'm new to "passions" but I wanted you to know this is sobeautiful and apt. Exactly the way I feel when reading other people's work. thank you. kethry. When dark of night takes your soul Think of me and be made whole. |
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juliet_2u Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125North Carolina |
Mark, WOW, did it ever work. That was awesome. Our words, whether, spoken or written can be very powerful. I saw so much beauty and tenderness here also. Fantastic job. Take care, Juls |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Cerenity-Glad you enjoyed it and the thanks go to all the poets here as there is from where it came. ![]() Lynne-welcome and it is always nice to have a new lover of verse among us. That is why we are here. Thanks to you. Juls-Thanks for the WOW it made me smile. Glad you liked it ![]() |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
ah...the joy of words! |
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