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Open Poetry #8
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Wishing You Were Home
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Wishing You Were Home |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada 
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Miss the times when we were younger and the love we did invest and of all the love I kicked around I thought ours was the best. But I was never there for you and it drew us far from close. I was in sales and telling tales and drinking patron toasts. I showed no favor for your choice and you spent your time alone. Now you're gone and time moves on I know I did you wrong. All the good times I could find took me far away from you and left you trapped alone inside while I was seeking dues. Now this lonely heart and mind roam round this empty soul and the lesson lingers overtime I'm wishing you were home. I call you in the early morning to draw the past to mind. A brave new me a change complete I offer to your mind. You talk to me and my heart flips I beg you back again. A concerned woman you see me and I can't seem to win. It's plain and simple who's to fault and your worries shake me off but you turn heartache into hoping and I'm glad to hear you talk. Through all the times you held my name and stated your case with style and in the stress you'd address the absence of my smile but your hopes grew sadly thin I destroyed our cause. I did'nt see your needs then I sought my own applause. Your love finally turned to ice it took a long long time, now I live with the sacrifice of pushing you from my mind. I remember our first home a simple captured thrill and our driven dreams where the future gleams with the needs that al must fill and the late nights laying back talking after love and the fire there thast filled the air was the flame of all first loves. Now I've turned to other means you say your heart won't mend So I push on into somewhere and I call you now and then. But when it's very late at night and I turn to share your soul I cry softly to myself while someone plays your role. All the good times ruled my mind and I know I'm still alone under these scars I need your heart and I'm wishing you were home. Celtrue2000@E3B1G9 |
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| © Copyright 2000 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
ethone--oh, yes...this is a song! I can almost hear it. It is a touching story also, filled with the knowledge of regret and honesty of feeling...I really like it. A vote here. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
ETHome~ 'Through all the times you held my name and stated your case with style and in the stress you'd address the absence of my smile' The entire piece is filled with the honest emotions of a heart that weeps the regret. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Adrienne Junior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 20California |
My goodness, I can't even tell you how this made me feel. It brought tears to my eyes... A splendid piece.... |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
ETHome, Oh, this one was more than worth the read. Great writing here!! You touched my heart with your depth of feeling. LW  Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
The feelings are raw and honest in this piece and it hurts to read, to many things I relate to I guess. This is a great piece you have my vote and my best wishes for a healed heart~ [This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 07-18-2000).] |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Oh ethome how you touch me with this...it hurts so much to read yet its so very beautiful never say never |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
it took a long long time, now I live with the sacrifice of pushing you from my mind. I remember our first home a simple captured thrill and our driven dreams where the future gleams with the needs that al must fill and the late nights laying back talking after love and the fire there thast filled the air was the flame of all first loves. Now I've turned to other means you say your heart won't mend So I push on into somewhere and I call you now and then. But when it's very late at night and I turn to share your soul I cry softly to myself while someone plays your role. All the good times ruled my mind and I know I'm still alone under these scars I need your heart and I'm wishing you were home. ======================== oh my sweet poet friend... your just so darn good at this... the rhyme is pure poetry the cadence is melodic and perfect and the emotions are so touching in their sincerity and grace.. wonderful writing Ethome...truly take care jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you Martie for thinking of the song angle and the kind words Marge I always appreciate your comments and yes I tried to be as honest as I could with the piece as a lot of it is true.... Thank you Adrienne for feeling the emotion to the fullest Thanks Lone Wolf for feeling the depth I was trying so hard to portray Butterflies_don't_cry for being able to relate.. Paula thank you so much for taking the time to feel this. Janet I always appreciate your kind words, they are always so upbuilding and straight from the heart.....I try my hardest to make these poetic stories reach the reader. So thank you so much my dear poet friend. |
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gem Junior Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 39 |
This is absolutely beautiful! It's tear-jerking stuff. Makes me wonder if there could be anyone in my past who feels that way about me!! Gem |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
What a heartfelt poem, ethome... lovely and well written... surely the pangs are felt... ..... All the good times ruled my mind and I know I'm still alone under these scars I need your heart and I'm wishing you were home. ...... regards, sudhir |
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Beth Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 468WA, Australia |
~I truly adored this poem. It brought tears to my eyes...absolutely brilliant~ |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you Gem for your kind remarks I'm glad you enjoyed. Thanks Sudhir I was relating some from the past that's for sure.. Thank you Beth I truly do appreciate your comments |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
a very moving piece ethome ... it touched me ... |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Ethome, How true this writing is. A story repeated by mistakes so many times. Very well done. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
As I read this, I could almost hear Harry Chapin singing it. Touching storytelling, my friend. Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
This story is so true for many, and is so well told. A sad but captivating story. Liz |
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Slim Junior Member
since 2000-07-19
Posts 49Kentucky, USA |
Wow....i dunno what to say, it really got to me. This piece was great. The feeling, the emotion, it truly touched my heart. There are so many things that we regret in life...not loving is a big one, but time brings forgiveness. ^^Slim^^ |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
WOW Ethome! Absolutely stunning my friend ... beautifully worded, with genuine tenderness and regret. Truly lovely words! Best wishes, /Kit |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you MA Miller glad you stopped in. Thank you Bill, even mistakes make a story Thanks for the reference to Harry Chapin Meadowmuse, I feel very complimented by that. I am a Chapin fan and I could only wish to write that well.. Thank you Elizabeth for taking the time to read this partially true sad story. Thanks Slim for you kind words I'm glad you enjoyed... It's true Kit there is some real life regrets here that I am writing about. Thanks again for your fine words. |
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Gemini Senior Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 1203Wisconsin, USA |
ethome-Wow, this filled my heart with words I can't even describe. Beautifully written style filled with love, mourning, honesty and regret. I'm sorry you had to reach this point in your life, hugs to you my friend. It does take a lifetime to heal. I wish you better tomorrow's. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Thank you Gemini for your kind comments. |
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