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Open Poetry #8
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Last Night
| Open Poetry #8 |
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Last Night |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
*Author's note~~~ This is not real, though am sure it has happened to other people. It just came to me one night - after being angry --and I thought this could have happened.* Last Night I kiss your waxen cheek and the coffin covers you forever and my eyes still not dry, watch as the dirt hits the coffin, the sound never to be forgotten. Should I have known, Was there anything I could have done? You were there we had one of our normal arguments we never really yelled, but should I have known I would wake and you would be gone? Did I say I love you enough or did you always know? Did you toss, and I not feel you go? Could I bring back time and say I love you and hold you, making you mine? Now, I know the last words could hurt, I feel like the dirt ~ loud sounding upon your coffin. If only I had known. Though, I learned to never ever go to bed angry at my loved ones, and to always kiss them goodbye at the door, I knew that then. Oh why, oh why, did I allow our last night to end with anger in our hearts? I loved you so. I hope you know. ~netswan |
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| © Copyright 2000 Teresa King - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
NetSwan~ Wow ! An avalanche of emotion here. 'Now, I know the last words could hurt, I feel like the dirt ~ loud sounding upon your coffin. If only I had known.' ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Netswan~ WOW this is very powerful, hit me like a tone of bricks very well said Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed reading this...anger can be like words of death...James |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
netswan a very powerful awesome flow of emotions here, very well expressed... Now, I know the last words could hurt, I feel like the dirt ~ loud sounding upon your coffin. If only I had known. Though, I learned to never ever go to bed angry at my loved ones, and to always kiss them goodbye at the door, I knew that then. Oh why, oh why, did I allow our last night to end with anger in our hearts? ... enjoyed reading... and am glad this is fiction.. regards, sudhir |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
Thanks Marge, Tracie, Jmlee and Sudhir. I appreciate your comments. Warmly, ~netswan |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
We don't always say what we really want to say when we should. Even if it did'nt make a difference it would still be wonderful to let it out, empty the heart, cleanse the soul. Beautifully sad if there is such a thing. Well done! |
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Ethan Halo Senior Member
since 2000-04-28
Posts 793on the roof again |
i am very glad this is a work of fiction. what feels right at the time doesn't always seem so great the next day. i think will smith said it best when he said "hate in your heart will consume you too". very well penned thoughts. i hope it's all goin good now. We all got our demons. We all got somethin' to atone for. |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
netswan, This is a powerful and thought provoking piece. I am happy it is not a true story, but I can sure see how something like that could happen. Guess the lesson is to never go to bed angry at your loved ones and do not say things you do not mean for they may be the last words you speak. Fabulous writing!!  Hey!! Welcome back!! LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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