Open Poetry #8 |
Her Heart |
Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Her heart was once an open book All it took was a single look From his eyes of deep brown For the walls to come crashing down He was her dream come true In her heart she just knew With him she was meant to be Destined together for eternity He could always make her smile Regardless of the current trial Sometimes it was with a joke Or some funny words he spoke She thought he was the best Nothing at all like the rest He seemed to be one of a kind Like a rare treasure she could find Her heart once knew true love Sent on a cloud from above Blue skies turned to gray Suddenly on that fateful day The wall was rebuilt brick by brick The smell of mortar was so thick This treasure was soon tainted Erasing the visions they'd painted Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from emotion recollected in tranquility. --William Wordsworth |
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© Copyright 2000 Jennifer L. Garcia - All Rights Reserved | |||
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Sad, very well written, some things are'nt forever but the quality of this poetry is. Great work! "The wall was rebuilt brick by brick the smell of mortar was so thick." Great metaphors, I can relate to that sad but true atmosphere. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
now i am crying |
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Lady Web Member
since 2000-04-12
Posts 96Houston, Texas |
Great Stuff I like this very much. I'm such a sucker for all kinds of love poems. It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. [This message has been edited by Lady Web (edited 07-09-2000).] |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
OH L.W. this one drove in deep and then the knife turned....this one hurt sweetie!! You wrote from so deep with this one....soon my friend...WE SURVIVED poems will come, but until the do......I understand this poem so well........comfort comes with understanding. ****AW hugs***** |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
so sad LW...but so well expressed... funny thing about fate and destiny tho ... the same walls they put up ... they can tear down ... all we have to do is allow our selves to believe again ... take care my friend, it can only get better jm I think I could need - this in my life If you're gone - baby you need to come home there's a little bit of something me In everything in you MB20 |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
LW great poem. So very well written. Sad though --- ~netswan |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
LW-I know these walls all too well and I shed tears for you knowing that you are going through this right now. I truely hope that the next time the walls stay down and that it would be soon for you. Excellent and very heart wrenching. |
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Beth Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 468WA, Australia |
~Truly a lovely poem~ ~Blessed Be, Beth~ |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
~~Sometimes love really hurts~~ This read is sad, but real.. Hold life with an open hand....leaving it room to grow.... |
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Trew Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Ottawa, Canada |
I hate that feeling. Almost, almost....nope. It's sad, really. Knowing that someone is right and not being able to show them. Perhaps, by definition, that means they aren't right? Hmmm. Oh yes, this is where you comment on the poem, not get all introspective and philosophical. Whoops. Another fine poem, Lone Wolf. Sad, but well written. Keep them coming! Trew. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Lone Wolf, This is quite a sad tale here... but very well written, vividly put across, makes one take a step back and ponder... regards, sudhir. |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
ethome . . . Thank you, I try to use good metaphors when I write. Paula . . . Here, have a tissue. Lady Web . . . You are so right. It is a risk I'd take again in a heartbeat!! BDC . . . Watch that knife!! Did not mean for it to hurt, just working out some feelings you know. I feel much comfort in your understanding, my friend. Yes, soon WE SURVIVED will be the theme. *****AW HUGS TO YOU***** JM . . . Thank you, you are so right my friend. The walls can be removed or rebuilt in an instant. I do believe, my friend. You take care too. Yes, only place to go is up!! netswan . . .Thank you!! Mark . . . Thank you for reading and replying. I know my time will come. Beth . . . Welcome to Passions!!! Thanks for reading!!! Sunny1 . . . Yes, sometimes it does. Thank you for reading!! Welcome to Passions!! Trew . . . I hate it too. LOL, be as philosophical as you want!! Thank you very much. They will be coming. Hope you keep reading. Sudhir . . . Many things in life are worth a ponder. Thank you, I try to be as realistic as possible when I write. Poetry should surprise by a fine excess and not by singularity - it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts, and appear almo |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
OOOF!! Very well written emotions here my friend |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
Jeffrey, Thank you. LW Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats |
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