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Teen Poetry #3
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An Un-Perfect Picture
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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An Un-Perfect Picture |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ 
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If I painted a picture, what do you think you'd see? Would you see someone else, or would you see me? Would the person be happy, or someone upset and sad? Should it be a smile, or someone going mad? Would there be a grin, painted across the face. Or should there be just an empty space? Why dont you, paint a picture of me? And tell me what it is, that you really see. ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ [This message has been edited by ERIN (edited 07-26-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 Erin Erbs - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Gossamerwings Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 207 |
I see ERIN, questioning who she is and who she wants to be, what she will become.I also see a young poet,rhyming so well.It is good to question.  Gossamerwings ;) |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
GOSS~~~i have had a case of writers block lately and this is one that i just recently came up with...i am not questioning myself really...at least i dont think i am...thanks for replying... ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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Jacman Member
since 2000-06-27
Posts 291Dwight Il, US |
Erin, I've often wandered what people saw when they looked at me. I know that my own perception of myself is untrue because I'm me. And I can't see myself like you can. Any way, I'm not sure what I'm trying to say because I lost my thought. Great read. Jason  Just as soon as I belong, then it's time I disapear... -Metallica- |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
jacman~~~the thing i wonder about is if people see me the way i see myself...i wonder what they think of me...how if they ever did would they paint my picture...their views of me...you catch my drift... ohh and how you forgot what you were gonna say...it must have been a lie...lol thats what i tell my boyfriend if he forgets what he was gonna tell me... ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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sherm Member
since 2000-07-21
Posts 94Evansville,IN |
cool poem i really like how it basically just puts the reader on the spot and says what do you think of me you said youd been having wrighters block but this was a good breakthrough |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
sherm~~~last night after we stopped talking when i got off i decided to sit down and see if i could write anything...i ended up writing 3 poems...i dont know where they came from...like out of nowhere...thanks for your comments... ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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Jeremy Halstead Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569Morris, Ill. U.S.A |
I'd paint a picture of ya, but don't know what ya look like...anyways, this was a really creative thought for a poem. I do believe I enjoyed it. Jeremy "Time is the matter, and in a matter of that all wounds will heal and all scars shall fade." |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
well jeremy why dont you do this...paint a picture of what you would expect to see...then maybe one day in the future we will meet and you can show me this picture of how you thought i would be...LOL ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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Sheila425 New Member
since 2000-07-26
Posts 9 |
Erin, Even when the writers block kicks in, you always have something great to hide that. I admire your capability to write such beautiful poetry. Hugs and Kisses, *~Sheila~* "Never frown...you never know who is falling in love with your smile." |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
Sheila~~~thanks for replying to my poem...by the way i like you quote...it makes me think... ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ |
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IsGona Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723 |
Nice poem ERIN. I think we all would like to know how others precieve us. "Cinnamon and sugary, and softly spoken lies You never know just how you look through other people's eyes" ~ Butthole Surffers - Pepper Nicely done, IsGona |
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Martini Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 308Toronto, Ontario, Canada |
erin great poem... I really enjoyed this one... I once asked someone what they saw when they looked at me, it was a tough realization to hear what they had to say, but a good learning experience none the less... excellent "In three words I can sum up everything I learned about life: It Goes On" ~Robert Frost |
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Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
isgona~~~thanks for your reply...i dont even know why i wrote it...i was bored and it came in my head what other people think of my...on theirs views of how they see me...i like that quote of yours too... martini~~~i know what you mean about the experiences...life is just full of them...thanks for your reply...but you see what other people say is what they think of you...honestly if its coming from someone close to me it matters...if its someone i dont know to well...i could care less...you know what im saying???< !signature--> ~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~ [This message has been edited by ERIN (edited 07-27-2000).] |
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