»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #3
»
You (Please comment :)
| Teen Poetry #3 |
|
You (Please comment :) |
|
|
Neokrew Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 60VA |
You Angels begin to sing My heart pounds My pule throbs My lungs get tight Your radiance its A blinding light As you walk passed My heart aches And the angels stop [This message has been edited by Neokrew (edited 12-29-2000).] |
||
| © Copyright 2000 J. T. C. - All Rights Reserved | |||
Skyfire 
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
Does this perhaps describe the feelings you get from a certain someone? A stranger? If so, don't worry. Eventually you'll find someone who will feel the same way about you. If not, well...  Awesome poem.~*Skyfire *~Always Canadian*~ ~*~I used to be an idiot, but I'm all right now~*~ |
||
|
Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Wow Neokrew, this kicked some serious butt..Keep posting!! I love your stuff! ~Carly |
||
|
jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
nice poem, very breviloquent. jeremy r "A writer doesn't acquire a vacancy of mind, but rather a inadequacy of words." - Jeremy D. Raulinaitis |
||
|
kimmy Member
since 2000-07-31
Posts 98 |
i liked this...it describes these feelings about someone so well...good job... |
||
|
Neokrew Member
since 2000-12-24
Posts 60VA |
Thank you all for the nice comments. What did youu think of the title? --Neo |
||
|
Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I like the poem! I think it does a great job of getting the point across. The title? Oh, you mean I make you feel this way, well, uh, oh, wait a minute...anyway, I think it's a little plain, but it works. I think the person's name (not sure if you'd want to do that though) would be cool for the title, but what you have works fine. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
||
|
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
nice one pal............i likes.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
||
|
DreamerGrl27 Member
since 2000-10-29
Posts 142 |
I really liked this one...I know what feeling you're talking about. |
||
|
Tears of Glass Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 182Physically? VA.... Mentally? I'm not quite sure |
I am impressed!! Awesome poem... I just wish i knew who it was about! But you'll tell me right??  I know you will.. Good poem. Keep posting! (You better! ) *Jen |
||
|
Melster Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442Brisbane, Qld, Australia |
Short and sweet and straight to the point... Melz!! Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly |
||
|
xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This poem was wonderful...it was short and sweet...good job |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
