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DancinQueen
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since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA

0 posted 2000-12-23 01:08 PM


maybe

All I ever wanted
was to be different
from every other girl
through your eyes.
I wanted to leave
a piece of me with you.
I wanted to matter
and not be forgotten.
I wanted to make
you question yourself
and what you
didn't notice
Maybe I failed
or maybe
you failed to see
how special i truly am


-=Ok well...it bugs me when I write poems that dont ryhme. i dont know why..just does. But so you know..whenever I write a poem that doesnt rhyme its because my emotions are so raw i cant even get it out on paper and think about it to make it ryhme. so i know its silly...but so u know  




¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

© Copyright 2000 Kiley - All Rights Reserved
Acies
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
1 posted 2000-12-23 02:37 PM


hey peach...hey sweets!!!

You know that a poem doesn't really have to rhyme.  Look at E.B.B., she wrote that amazing poem and it doesnt really rhyme.  Personally, I consider poems that don't rhyme as a step above rhyming ones.  That's my opinion, and I hope that if someone reads this reply, they don't get offended.  it's just an opinion.  And in another opinion of mine  , you are getting better at your writing...keep it up

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


Child of the Stars
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since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
2 posted 2000-12-23 09:01 PM



  Hi there. This was a great poem. Usually the poems with 'raw emotion' seem to be the deeper and more interesting ones to read, like this one. Great job.

  ~Carly

WhY
ShOuLd I
Be hypnotized with someone else's lies
WhY
ShOuLd I
Take time and pride in what someone else believes...

xShUgArHiGhx
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Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
3 posted 2000-12-23 10:30 PM


Hey gurl!!!! What is up!?! I loved this poem...it bothers me sooo much too when my poems dont ryhme lol...but i really liked this one and i hope if he doesnt already, see how truely special you are!! Great poem hun... muahz
DancinQueen
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since 2000-07-29
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Kokomo,IN,USA
4 posted 2000-12-24 02:47 AM


thanks guys

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

DancinQueen
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since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
5 posted 2000-12-24 02:48 AM


thanks guys

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

DancinQueen
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Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
6 posted 2000-12-24 02:48 AM


thanks guys

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

DancinQueen
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Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
7 posted 2000-12-24 02:48 AM


uggh sorry bout that

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

Melster
Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442
Brisbane, Qld, Australia
8 posted 2000-12-24 02:58 AM


Rhyming...  what's that - just kidding - my poems rarely rhyme, you write well and I hope you keep up the great work!

Melz!!


Dont believe what ur eyes r telling u they only show limitation. Look with ur understanding, find out what u already know & u will see the way to fly

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
9 posted 2000-12-24 02:04 PM


The poem showed raw emotion. Just your unfiltered thoughts on paper.....nice one here. Hope all is well.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them!


jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
10 posted 2000-12-25 12:35 PM


on top of agreeing with acire about your writing improving, i also feel that this poem was an emetional experience for you!

jeremy r

"A writer doesn't acquire a vacancy of mind, but rather a inadequacy of words." - Jeremy D. Raulinaitis

Salooma
Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781

11 posted 2000-12-25 12:39 PM


that was a great post...
doesn't matter if it doesn't rhyme...
you gotta always have the mixture of those that do and those that don't....
very nice

Salma

DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
12 posted 2000-12-25 05:41 PM


thanks guys   Merry Christmas everyone!!

¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

Jenn Cirrincione
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Posts 2107
Fl
13 posted 2000-12-25 07:30 PM


Merry Christmas folks!! This poem was very good... I never like to rhyme my poetry, I feel constricted through the framework. I like free verse, no specific rhyme scemes... and you see.... it has worked for you!! Good work, nice writing, keep 'em flowing.
xoxo
Jenn


"A person can never get over a broken heart if they aren't willing to let go of all of the pieces."-- ??


Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
14 posted 2000-12-26 01:47 AM


For some reason DQ I love poems that dont rhyme. But for some odd reason I could never write one that didnt rhyme. I like this one alot. I have noticed alot of good poetry up here today. Keep up the good work girl!!!

People leave our lives as quickly as they come, but the ones that mean something leave footprints in our hearts.

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
15 posted 2000-12-27 12:03 PM


I like this one a lot, it is written well, as usual!

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.thehungersite.com

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