Teen Poetry #3 |
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Pan of Thought |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico ![]() |
NOTE: I guess tonight i'm just getting rid of a few of my BLAH-crap poems..........I hope at least some of you have fun with these.....Once again, BLAH! Pan of Thought: Moving along the road of past. Thinking of an unborn thought. Clouds of never that cannot last. Pure love is what I was always taught. Running through the forest of time. Unknown land sarcastically viewed. Wishing for a full blown mind. The world of love, the world renewed. Grains of sand scooped from life's pan. I've seen the light, but lost the way. Wandering through darkness was not my plan. Dying without thought, living without say. ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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© Copyright 2000 Pepe de la Muerte - All Rights Reserved | |||
IsGona Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723 |
Well this didn't have the usual flow I am use to from you, but besides that I thaught it was great. I would not say it is blah by any means. IsGona "Every body has their destiny... I'LL CHOOSE MY OWN ~Hatebreed~ |
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Minister of Dissonance Junior Member
since 2000-12-10
Posts 20 |
interesting imagery, focus slightly skewed during progression *scream* the great dissonant one |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
pretty cool, i wouldnt say its blah either but it was still a good one. Jeremy R. "...if you've never met me, then you've no right to judge me. I have a good heart, but this heart can get ugly." ~DMX~ |
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Melster Member
since 2000-12-09
Posts 442Brisbane, Qld, Australia |
Yeah I agree - It is a good poem - just gott afigure out the meaning of it is all!! Love Melz!! |
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Child of the Stars![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Hey. I too thought the rhythm was a bit iffy, but the poem was not blah!! "Eh", maybe, but not "blah". Tootelz. ~Carly |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
This poem was good, but nothing special. *cowers in fear from Dopey* But thanks for sharing it ![]() "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
*slams guitar on Lake's head* haha no i appreciate your honesty pal.....even i know it licks. Thanks for the reply though.....and everybody else......thanks! ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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apsara Member
since 2000-11-09
Posts 70 |
Nah its not a blah. Liked the graphic stuff. Clouds of never that cannot last. Grains of sand scooped from life's pan. Definitely not a blah. apsara |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
it was good.. regina |
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