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Teen Poetry #3
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Thoughts
| Teen Poetry #3 |
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Thoughts |
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apsara Member
since 2000-11-09
Posts 70 |
Thoughts One day in November It changed the course of life It was a day to remember The day I took my fatal dive The demons in my head They kept whispering nothingness I soon wished I were dead I listened to them, they told me... I kept telling them that this place was cold They continued laughing maniacally Telling me, shouting that my soul was sold I cried, I tried to remember in vain They told me I jumped into the abyss I remembered then, I remembered what I felt The thoughts that ran through my head, this Chased me to the end of my trip |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
This was great. I liked the poem but it was kind of confusing. Could you explain exactly what you are trying to say in this poem.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I don't think I quite get what you're saying here either. I did like the way the poem was written though  "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This was an amazing, powerful poem. It was also very strong in its words..i liked it a lot. |
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apsara Member
since 2000-11-09
Posts 70 |
I guess I wanted this poem to sound confused. Its like when you hear voices in your mind that puts you down and causes yourself to doubt others. You don't really want to listen to those negativity but if you succumb to what they say then you're lost with no grip to hold on to. Nothing to believe in. That's when you destroy yourself. The main point of the poem is to not listen to the negativity in your head and to push them away or if you do not then you might lose yourself and your own identity. I guess it sounds even more confusing after I tried interpreting it but that is what it means to me. apsara |
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