Teen Poetry #3 |
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You I Miss |
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Ender Member
since 1999-12-08
Posts 200Yuma, AZ USA ![]() |
*Note: I am really into this new style I am writing with. It may be more challenging, but the result is well worth it* You, I miss You passionate kiss Together, that day Wow is all I can say Your beauty, how grand It always makes me stand Jaw drops, as I see You walk towards me Warmth, as we hug Give my hear a little tug Passion, as we kiss I don’t want to end this Wake, I must do This day, I must get through Till the next, when together I will love you forever *Blonde people are normal. Everyone else is just strange. -Ender* |
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© Copyright 2000 Richard Melick - All Rights Reserved | |||
Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I like the style and the poem. Just a typo note- third stanza second line "hear" should be "heart", but of course that really doesn't matter since this poem is so good. I really like the flow of it, great job ![]() "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!! http://www.thehungersite.com |
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Dopey Dope![]()
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Yea I am going to have to agree with Lake on just about everything. I think this style of yours is great. I like it a lot. It flows rather nicely. Great message in the poem aswell. Haven't seen you for a while....post more! ![]() I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I hate your socks. I'd like to burn them! |
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xShUgArHiGhx![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
I really love this style of writing too! I flows beautifully. You really express how much you long for this person...sometimes i think missing someone is the hardest thing...or the most annoying...not shur. N e wayz great poem! |
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