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Teen Poetry #3
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Ceinwyn
Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175
VA

0 posted 2000-10-09 03:03 PM


Tell me what I have done so wrong
Was it something that I failed to say
Or something I failed to hold back
Maybe you should have looked deep within my eyes when you had the chance
Yet instead it felt like you were disregarding destiny's dance
I took it all the wrong way
And you came off all wrong
The coldness in your voice
Let me know that you were no longer going to sing your song
So the impression I got was only from you
From the things that you didn't do
You were too vague, even for me
You should have known that in a million years I wouldn't have been able to take the clue
But you obviously thought I knew
You're love was such a blind one
That's all I know
But now I'm done I'm through and now I must go
I couldn't ever possibly admit anymore to the fact that I once and
could ever love you
So was it really something that I failed to do?
Or is the fault really not found within you
Perhaps I shall never know exactly the reason why
To why I don't even have the strength nor time to cry
Or even continuously swallow such a bitter lieā€¦




"Let me be the one you call, if you jump I'll break your fall, lift you up and fly away with you into the night"

~Crash and Burn~

© Copyright 2000 Kristen Brandon - All Rights Reserved
Jacman
Member
since 2000-06-27
Posts 291
Dwight Il, US
1 posted 2000-10-09 03:14 PM


The words are just flowing beautifly in this poem.  Sometimes we can't help but fall short bucause sometimes its just not meant to be.  Thats when you just say "oh well," and like we say at the end of baseball season for the cubs, "theres allways next year."  Or next time for you.  Keep writing and smile big today.

jason

I'm not concieted...I'm convinced.

Jenn Cirrincione
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
2 posted 2000-10-09 05:16 PM


Nice writing! Strong emotion here.
Kudos....!
Jenn


"He's mastered the art, of looking sincere, his eyes have a way, of making you stay, don't look in the mirror"- Chely Wright

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
3 posted 2000-10-09 07:56 PM


Very well expressed feelings here, nicely written!

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Me!!

Jeremy Halstead
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569
Morris, Ill. U.S.A
4 posted 2000-10-10 04:36 AM


Congratulations......I'm actually crying for the first time since the night before I left Baltimore.  I don't know what you thought when you wrote those poems that you recently posted, but they hurt.  You had me all wrong, and you lashed out at me and it hurt.
I wasn't backing away, or lying...but after I read those poems, I haven't even come close to knowing how to approach you.  To answer your question, yes... I was waiting fer you to call...but you decided that it wasn't worth it.  You're obviously in alot of pain about something that's just plain not howyou think it is.  If you call me, you'll know.

Jeremy

Curse not upon love, for it is the greatest of great things. Be it not love that curses you....but thy lack thereof. -J.D.H.


Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
5 posted 2000-10-10 02:55 PM


Wow, something is up with jeremy and you. This is odd. I have no idea what's up but it seems the both of you are in a lot of pain. Hope things work out.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
6 posted 2000-10-30 08:31 PM


This is a first...2 people that actually know each other in here and has or had something going on? or maybe im wrong.  What's going on here?

I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR


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