»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #3
»
The Stars Above, hope you'll like it....
| Teen Poetry #3 |
|
The Stars Above, hope you'll like it.... |
|
|
Lone Insomniac Junior Member
since 2000-08-05
Posts 45 |
well I've been away for a while, I see a lot of new names around here and I didn't stop writing all the time I wasn't here, sooo I have a lot of stuff to show you..I really like this poem myself... Hope U do too greetz, Robin These stars that shine, above Sitting here, can’t get enough Like the trees that grow out of the ground I just sit and stop making a sound When the violence comes above I just doubt if this is enough Like the leafs that fall to the ground Dying people stopped making a sound Close your eyes and take the fall but you can’t stop embracing it all Like your footsteps land on the ground When you fall you stop making a sound Everyone on the cliff wait by fall We can’t say goodbye, loving it all Like our beliefs stay in the ground The voices of our gods stopped making their sound Our utter emotions rise above Destroying the thing we call our love Hating eachother it’s never enough So I stare to the stars above... The balance of a dead planet comes above... |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Lone Insomniac - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Hey wow, i really liked this poem. I think the last line was a great touch, very creative. The balance of the dead planet. WOAH! HAHAHAHA!!!!! I loved it. Keep posting!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
||
|
Erin Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527~Chicago~ |
The last line was perfect!!!Along with the rest of the poem...I cant wait to see more of your work!!! ~*~TrUe LoVe Is ThE cLoSeSt ThInG tO hEaVen~*~ |
||
|
Nikkisweet Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 183Tx, Dallas |
This is great! My favorite part: "Close your eyes and take the fall but you can't stop embracing it all" You have a way with words  Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to become lost again. -unkown- |
||
|
LyricFetish Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 528North Carolina |
Now this I like. I am really in love w/ your poem. Toward the end, your wording was just unbelievably awesome! Keep up the great work, my friend. *~Meredith~* I'll just keep on laughing, Hiding the tears in my eyes... *Oleander |
||
|
sweetstuff101 Member
since 2000-07-27
Posts 375OK, USA |
wow! that was awesome, you have some talent. well great poem, keep writing! Luv, ~*~sweetstuff~*~ ~¤*¤~iF yOu LuV sOmEoNe, PuT ThEiR nAmE iN a CiRcLe, iNsTeAd Of A hEaRt, BcUz HeArTz CaN bReAk, BuT CiRcLeZ gO oN 4eVeR~¤*¤~ |
||
|
Angel Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551Pennsylvania |
Hey, good to see you back  . I really like this poem. There is a lot of depth and your wording was really good. I can't wait to see more .~Susie "Do you love me because I am beautiful, or am I beautiful because you love me?" ~Cinderella |
||
|
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Great to see some more from you Robin! Very nicely woven ... with an intriguing message, well done! Best wishes, /Kit |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
