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Teen Poetry #3
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Nikkisweet
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 183
Tx, Dallas

0 posted 2000-06-19 11:05 PM



My guy will have eyes
To see me
My guy will have ears
To hear me
My guy will have arms
To hold me
My guy will have legs
To take me away
My guy will have words
To confort me
My guy will have lips
To kiss me
My guy will have a heart
To love me

© Copyright 2000 Nikkisweet - All Rights Reserved
Tangomage
New Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 7

1 posted 2000-06-19 11:53 PM


Simple and poetic.  It's straight, to the point, and says what needs to be said.  I hope you find what you're looking for.   Check out my poem "No Matter What".  It has a similar repetition scheme.  Nice job.

Every man dies, but not every man really lives.

Jeremiah Johnson
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 1223
Brooksville, Fl, U.S
2 posted 2000-06-20 01:28 AM


great poem it holds alot of meaning hope you find who your looking for but remember not everyone is perfect.

I'm the lord, I'm the havoc, I'm the soul



Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
3 posted 2000-06-20 05:50 AM


Lovely poem Nikki. I hope you'll find him  
Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

4 posted 2000-06-20 03:16 PM


Hey, that was really good.  Short, but sweet and to the point!
Bel

Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

5 posted 2000-06-20 03:16 PM


Hey, that was really good.  Short, but sweet and to the point!
Bel

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
6 posted 2000-06-20 07:41 PM


I like this, it's so sweet..sometimes you just need to keep it simple and say what you want!  
kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
7 posted 2000-06-20 08:15 PM


Ditto the rest's comments...short,simple and yet so true
Jeremy Halstead
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 569
Morris, Ill. U.S.A
8 posted 2000-06-21 03:51 AM


hhhhmmmm...Interesting...very direct, very clear...I like it, oooohhh baby, I like it!!

Jeremy D. Halstead

"Time is the matter, and in a matter of that all wounds will heal and all scars shall fade."

Erin
Member Elite
since 2000-06-15
Posts 2527
~Chicago~
9 posted 2000-06-21 04:18 AM


THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST POEMS THAT I HAVE EVER READ. BUT TOO BAD NOT ALL GUYS WOULD BE LIKE THAT. ITS BEING PICKY TOO THOUGH. WHAT IF YOUR DREAM GUY WAS BLIND OR DEAF OR CRIPPLE? WOULD YOU STILL BE WITH THE GUY THEN? ITS LIKE A STEROTYPE OF GUYS. TO BAD WE GIRLS CANT CREATE THE PERFECT GUY THEN ORDER HIM. IM NOT TRYING TO CRITICIZE CAUSE I REALLY LIKED IT BUT MOST OF IT IS LIKE A WISH OR A DREAM. YOU KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING? WHY CANT ALL GUYS BE AS SWEET AS THE POEM MAKES THEM OUT TO BE. THIS IS ONE POEM THAT I WOULD DEFINITELY LIKE TO SEE IN A BOOK.

~IF YOU WANT SOMETHING VERY BADLY~SET IT FREE~IF IT COMES BACK TO YOU~ITS YOURS FOREVER~IF IT DOESNT IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO BEGIN WITH~

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
10 posted 2007-11-18 09:40 AM


Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

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