navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » Outside the building
Dark Poetry #2
Post A Reply Post New Topic Outside the building Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Zyell
Member
since 2000-07-28
Posts 121
USA

0 posted 2000-12-09 12:56 PM


Outside the building

In a continuous setting,
presenting a smile
stuffed with juicy fruit
gum and rotting teeth.
The old man would greet
him every morning outside his office.
The young man without
intention
had vaguely wondered if the old
man had once been
self adhesive
or perhaps even reliant.
Reluctantly, the young man had created this
stiff tradition,
mellowed, only slightly, by the elongated
shape he'd place in the aging bum's hand.
An appeasement, Cash, to ease the
guilt, to purchase food, or
the old man's temporary means of escape.
He unnerved the young man, this soot-coated
reflection, he wished he'd disappear.
He was an uncomfortable reminder,
that life seldom
goes as planned.


"I am an abstract of Circles"

© Copyright 2000 Zyell - All Rights Reserved
Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

1 posted 2000-12-09 09:42 PM


Nice to see you drop by..enjoyed as always..
this is one of my favorite forums in passions..i think you will like it..HUGS

                   ~Victoria~


A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
- Paul Valery (1871-1945)


Zyell
Member
since 2000-07-28
Posts 121
USA
2 posted 2000-12-09 09:55 PM


thanks Victoria.....I appreciate the warm response ~ S ~

Z

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
3 posted 2000-12-09 11:39 PM


Isn't that the truth-life never goes as planned.
Great images here.
Thanks for understanding my poem, also.
Sandra

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

4 posted 2000-12-10 03:41 AM


Suffering we can't alleviate does seem to make us uncomfortable, it's true...

great write - and nice to have you here...

K

Zyell
Member
since 2000-07-28
Posts 121
USA
5 posted 2000-12-10 04:38 PM


Catalinamoon - thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond, yes it makes me very sad to see those less fortunate, and often guilty, because there but for the grace of God go I.

Severn, thank you very much for the kind words, I hope to be reading some of yours
soon.

*S*
Z

"I am an abstract of Circles"

howpeculiar
Member
since 2000-12-12
Posts 56

6 posted 2000-12-12 08:19 AM


This is a peculiar subject, beautifully displayed in a unqiue form. I did like this quite a lot. Be well.
Zyell
Member
since 2000-07-28
Posts 121
USA
7 posted 2000-12-12 11:09 PM


peculiar.....what an unusual, peculiar name ~ grin, i think we might have something in common, it seems we both like "different". Thank you, I am glad you enjoyed my words!

I am relatively new myself, but I like to say welcome, and I hope to read some of your work soon!

Z

"I am an abstract of Circles"

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #2 » Outside the building

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary