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Dark Poetry #2
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The Kill
| Dark Poetry #2 |
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The Kill |
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Ian Llewellyn ap-Griffith Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 197Cincinnati, Oh, U.S.A. 
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Lighted for an instant 'neath a streetlamp in the park I stalked her with immortal skill Through Autumn in the dark Her breath was delicate and strong As it floated on the air I whispered with the slightest sound And warned her to beware She turned her green eyes toward me With only mortal sight She peered in my direction As I slipped behind the night Her heart beat faster with her steps Continuing her way I knew that I must have her By the dawning of the day And as I closed to win my prize She felt me drawing near I took her by her shoulders And I reveled in her fear And as my teeth sank into her She uttered one last word I cannot tell you what it was I'm not sure that I heard The rush of blood had filled my ears As she gave her life to me I felt her crumple in my arms With the purest ecstacy I left her as I found her Underneath the full moon's light The taste of life upon my lips As I return into the night Sing while you may -The Prophet Qa'sepel Your pain is for you alone, As it is, As it was, As it will be forever, Amen -The Prophet Qa'sepel |
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| © Copyright 2000 Darren Lausa - All Rights Reserved | |||
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
ah, im not into the whole "stalking" thing...but you sure made it sound sexy!*LOL* I could feel the quickening emotion here... i could "see" everything....very good read! cant wait to read about the next vicitm!  ~Dawn whatcha doing in this darkness baby when you know love will set you free? will you stay in the sea forever Drowning there for all eternity? ~Live |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Ian I am into the stalking thing and I thought this was very well done. I liked the way the suspense built until the dawn. Be well "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- Cole |
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Wren Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 312 |
Wow! I love it! Wonderful suspense! Good job! -Wren The thread of destiny Unknown by anyone Unseen by anyone Winds around your heart Moist with tears -Vampire Princess Miyu Theme |
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silentsky Member
since 2000-08-09
Posts 114 |
i liked this poem. i can feel the fear of the girl and at the same time the hunger of the stalker to have her. it is rare to be able to feel both of those feelings simultaneously... kat |
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kynder Senior Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 537Tallahassee, Florida |
being one who has been stalked, and had my life ripped from me, all i can say is good imagery. kynder Sunshine can not bleach The snow, Nor time unmake what Poets know. Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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boji stone Member
since 2000-08-13
Posts 62USA |
ohhhhhhhh, i love vampires...this was kewl~ enjoyed the presentation, vedy much! *S* bjstone |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Perfectly dark, Ian. And I agree, you could feel this from both positions, quite impressive. catalinamoon Words are things, and a small drop of ink, falling, like dew, upon a thought produces that which makes thousands, perhaps millions think. Lord Byron |
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Nikolette Sadness
since 2000-07-29
Posts 337port richey fl. |
i loved this poem and i do mean loved! this has got to be the best poem i have ever read in my life...chilling, thrilling, and yet so sad....i want to be her.... Nik i was once in love and happy...but you can call me Sadness. |
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Ian Llewellyn ap-Griffith Member
since 2000-02-12
Posts 197Cincinnati, Oh, U.S.A. |
Kynder, I am deeply sorry to have brought up painful images for you. I debated whether or not to post this piece. I assured myself that everyone would understand that this is a vamyric fantasy. I know that you understand this too, nonetheless, I apologise for disturbing you. Nik, I, for one, am glad that you are not the woman in the poem for not only would you be just a figment of my imagination but also you would no longer be among us and that we cannot allow! To you all, thank you for your replies, They mean the world to me. Sing while you may -The Prophet Qa'sepel Your pain is for you alone, As it is, As it was, As it will be forever, Amen -The Prophet Qa'sepel |
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