Open Poetry #9 |
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Eyes of Orion |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven ![]() |
Eyes of Orion Sometimes it seems that missing is all I can ever do my ears are always listening to each breeze with scent of you wishing that it might carry soft and sweetly flavored sound of words so light and airy my bonded heart is unbound each night I have to kiss you while looking up at Orion can it be the stars are blue could they have you on their mind do you think they remember when they watched as we both cried tears that fueled loves hot embers bringing flame to groom and bride unashamed of my weeping it was all that had remained an end to ceaseless seeking a love bound and unrestrained different tears they now see flow and of these I am ashamed to these watchful eyes they show to the rusting past I’m chained Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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© Copyright 2000 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved | |||
Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Such gorgeous words with poignant sorrow woven within. Exellent work, I enjoyed this greatly. ![]() *Krista Knutson* "You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." -Barbara DeAngelis |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Prometheus~ 'my ears are always listening to each breeze with scent of you' That is a beautiful thought. I so enjoy your writing. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
Jamie, there is a deep sadness and a glimmer of hope in this poem. It makes one want to weep in sorrow and then smile at the peace you portrayed. This is one of your best. Beautifully done! ![]() |
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insect Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014 |
Great writing! I think maybe the stars are watching! |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Jamie...again you make me cry...what is it about your words brown eyes that touches me so? |
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JnR4eva Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377Bronx, NY |
WOW so full of emotion and imagery...I enjoyed this poem a lot ![]() ![]() "my love is my motivation my love is my inspiration perception of this poem is your interpretation" -- me |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Excellent work! The stars, they see much. God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Unknown |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Sometimes it seems that missing is all I can ever do my ears are always listening to each breeze with scent of you wishing that it might carry soft and sweetly flavored sound of words so light and airy my bonded heart is unbound each night I have to kiss you while looking up at Orion can it be the stars are blue could they have you on their mind do you think they remember when they watched as we both cried tears that fueled loves hot embers bringing flame to groom and bride unashamed of my weeping it was all that had remained an end to ceaseless seeking a love bound and unrestrained ==================== Jamie, this is absolutely equisite... stunning poetry... sensual, sincere emotions and imagery ... laced with saddness and longing... and your rhyme flows like butter.. superb writing from your poets pen sir... (i see you've been to Haiku rehab) ![]() adding this jewel to my files take care jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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jfilius Junior Member
since 2000-08-14
Posts 29 |
Truely magnificent! you are defenatly on my list! thank you! john |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
A love so deep will never be removed entirely and this is a beautiful description of such a love. Wonderful work here Jamie just wonderful! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
this is so sadly beautiful, so very touching. Especially loved this..... Sometimes it seems that missing is all I can ever do my ears are always listening to each breeze with scent of you You pen such beautiful words Jamie ![]() |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
I thank you all for taking the time to read my poem and post these lovely replies. Perhaps one day I shall write of the freedom and joy of casting off the chains! yours, jamie |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
What could I do but give you a huge hug J? Stunning heart in this... definitely a difficult place you have been... ![]() "He looked across the silky surface of the Severn... it was a famously difficult river with fierce tides..." From Jack Maggs |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Jamie.... If anyone deserves a heart free of rusted chains, it is you. Your thoughts and writings are too grand to come from a heart with chains!! I'm sending a hug!!!! Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
I enjoyed this piece for its well~articulated emotion. The nearly archaic feel to your phrasings added to the theme of shameful sorrow. Lovely writing. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
to these watchful eyes they show to the rusting past I’m chained ...... EXCELLENT WORK here Jamie.... In admiration I offer, my regards, sudhir |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Lovely, with a touch of sadness. Yes, we'd like to see you write about freeing yourself from that past! Corinne |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Thanks so much! The hugs are warmly accepted and returned in kind. As long as a semblance of hope remains within us, so then does the prospect of happiness. Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Jamie...it hurts to read this... it's haunting to me..I can see the places you might stand in my mind's eye... wish I stood there with you again hons... ![]() |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Wow James, this is amazing ![]() Melissa~ |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
so do i ![]() |
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