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Open Poetry #9
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As the Seasons Slowly Turn, I suppose
| Open Poetry #9 |
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As the Seasons Slowly Turn, I suppose |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration 
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© 2000 Christopher Ward Springtime’s been hitched to the stars and so these wagons roll silently away Thus ends this big adventure I suppose Five thousand hours & a million smiles ride fast away from what we used to be into the setting dawn of can’t go back Fade now the darkness into lonely hues this Summer is screaming in desolation Fiery plumes from foggy gray teardrops casting shadows of moonlit smatterings So, another dreary nighttime I suppose Closing off my mind Fall stumbles near Trapping cascades and brilliant echoes of canned laughters and preserved joys It chases in rainbow falls of peaceful and it leaves me, breathlessly wistful I must wish outside for hope I suppose I unearth the ornaments of our passing to place them highly in my re-memories and peruse the pain over years gone by A house grown barren over molding loss scented with pine and laminated images Winter now nothing save an endless eve I can live without your love I suppose |
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| © Copyright 2000 C.G. Ward - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
"I must wish outside for hope..." and to answer the question, no, you can't...[live without {us}]! Wonderful, Chris! |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
As I slowly read this poem, I suppose I could say it's ok..but then I think of the time you took over each word...each phrase.. and the format. You care about your craft and it shows. So I suppose I will admit I love this..and it's very, very good!  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
A coming to terms here--and beautifully done, of course--read like a lengthy sigh...hugs to you m'lord...and admiration for this streamy dreamy piece. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
"Fade now the darkness into lonely hues" "I unearth the ornaments of our passing" Exquisite lines, though with images so rich, it was difficult to select anything "favorite" here, Chris. I enjoyed your many allusions to light and colour, and the elemental nature of your adjoining earth, sky and emotion. The full justification made for nice presentation, too.  ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Jenn E Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589Kelowna, BC, Canada |
This was so beautifully put together, Your use of words were perfect here. Very descriptive and well thought out I am sure. This you should be proud of, along with all the rest! Enjoyed this very much! Jenn E |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
A house grown barren over molding loss my favorite gem in a poem full of jewels Jamie Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil. "Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely". |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
I wanna post this one on my site. Can I? Can I? PULEASE? I love it! SUPERB work Chris!!! |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
I have never seen a more interesting block of words.... never at all... inspires me a lot... to try this one... (he he  me and poetry... I must be joking again...)Chris... My regards, sudhir |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Sunshin-y one - Are you quite sure about that? Remember, there's that psychological problem we discussed...  Sharon - Remember, you're supposed to be mean to me! Why? I don't know, but I'll not be able to get out the door now m'friend! Se'n - A thank you m'lady. I bow to kiss thy hand. Claire - Did I ever mention that I like how you read my poems? Jenn E - Wow. I'm humbled (Ok, I'm not, but it sounds nice to say that) by your kind reply! You give much to this that was not there before by laying your eyes and mind to it. I thank you for that. Jamie - Wow, a whole poem full of jewels! What say we go sell them and take a trip to Vegas??? Thank you for the understanding. Becca - LOL. Yes, of course you can. And I'll only charge you $0.10 a word. JUST KIDDING! Yes you may use it on your site! (just be sure to keep the formatting! If you have probs, let me know, I'll tell ya how I did it! )Sudhir - Needs not be a joke m'friend! I look forward to you doing this! (But pay attention... even the title is justified with the rest! ) Thank you sir!Chris |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Chris, The joke has become a reality, my friend and thanks for the tip... I am posting it in the open forum 9. Check it out and tell me if it is any good. Title: I wish upon a meteorite to get you back! regards, sudhir. |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
All I can say is "resistance if futile" you will be assimilated. Christopher you’ve been watching too many reruns of the Borg…lol But to be sincere this was amazing, as soon as I opened it I was assimilated. I’m with Claire whatever she means. I don’t really see a coming to terms here, to me more like An unsaid next thought would be… “But, I would prefer not to.” You are quite an innovator, can you do a perfect circle…lol. Parker |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Okay...I don't suppose you'll tell me how you did this one |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Thanks Chris! I'll let ya know when I'm ready |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I suppose that I have to say that I think you've done quite a good job on this one - I like your creatively square mind, my friend... |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Such a delight to read the render and find the formatting delicious Soon to be printed out on display ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Most excellent work. You continue to grow as a poet, as life infuses experience into talented hands. Corinne |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
very nicely crafted, Chris, very nice. Kathleen |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
For a poet to find a format that matches his personality is a rare thing indeed! Truthfully, I really admire the thought and effort you put into your work. It shows that you are a craftsman of the trade..a quality I admire....and I understood this one!!! |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
A screaming summer and a stumbling fall And re-remembering it all And teardrops of a foggy gray Make your poetry a realm away Superb Liz |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
All I can add to your rave reviews is "wow"...very fitting style for you sir. This one sure got the ooohs and aaaahs. |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Sudhir - I saw it and thought you did a fantabulous job! Haleyja - Hate to disappoint ya, but I'm not a Trekkie! LOL In reality, the truth of my thoughts lie somewhere between your VP and serenity's. There were thoughts of closure and final acceptance, but also a bite of: "I don't care anymore," or as you said "I wouldn't want to..." But I am also a firm believer in the idea that the reader creates their own interpretation, so yours is 100% valid! Thank you for the thoughts! As to the perfect circle... isn't that a new band... Ruth - Umm... I just wrote it? LOL... THe justification was due to character count matching exactly on each line. I used the "Courier new" font, since it is a fixed width font. That's it! Now where's yours? Becca - GREAT! Nan - Why thankee ma'am! I 'preciate your 'preciation! Marge - Ever a smile you provide. Thank you lady, for another one! Corinne - Thank you lady. Interesting wording, but tre altogether! How can we fail but to grow? We have the choice to go ahead, or to stagnate. I'm too partial about personal hygeine to allow the latter to occur!  Kathleen - Thank you for your reply! Bal - Hmm... Thank you... I think! Seriously... thank you. That means much to me that you appreciate the appreciation I have. It never fails to show, I believe, when someone really cares about what they are doing. It shows in their work, always! And...ermm... I'm glad you could "understand it"...? LOLLiz - And you lady. Ever warming the soul with smiles and beautiful words from a kind and caring, gentle heart. You've not failed this time either! Gen - Now there's a face I'd not expected to see again! Where ya been lady? Hmmm? Thank you muchly for making an appearance on this! Chris |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
"Fiery plumes from foggy gray teardrops casting shadows of moonlit smatterings" wow You are a poet. It doesn't get much better than this, Chris. (BOL) N |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
I read this a couple of days ago - due to time constraints I didn't deign to reply - lol... but here I is... well. This poem C is...hmmmm...finding words. Complete. Tight. It has such an unusual quality...can't quite put my finger on it. of course there are a few little things I would change...lol...of course. But, overall, it is a stunner. Most modern C, most modern...hehe...there's my seal of approval instantly. It just all fits together so well...words can do that can't they? K"He looked across the silky surface of the Severn, and remembered that it was a famously difficult river with fierce tides..." From J |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
"Trapping cascades and brilliant echoes of canned laughters and preserved joys" That would be my favorite in a nearly perfect piece of work my friend. Extremely well done, I loved it! *Krista Knutson* "You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." -Barbara DeAngelis |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
It is great, reading this again... |
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