Open Poetry #9 |
The Blood on Your Hands |
Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Hello there. Yes I’m talking to you. I've been watching what you’ve been doing. Did you think I wouldn’t notice? But don’t worry I’m not mad. Go ahead. Do what you want. Reach out to others, shine that little light of yours. Lead the lost ones through the night. Teach them goodness. Tell them of God. BUT DO NOT DOUBT, I will be there pulling, grabbing, undoing all that you have done. It’s not your fault. They just can’t help it, I'm just so much more fun. Even you, yes you hiding behind your silly cross and dogmatic beliefs, have desires and flaws. I can fix those flaws. I can give you what you need. I can do anything you want. Oh yes. I can and I will. And I ask only a small price. For I am the God of this world. I am behind the eyes of the wealthy, the intoxicated, the poor, and every one else around you. I am human nature. I am you. Don't you see? What? Where are you going? What’s wrong don’t like me? Is it something I said? So go ahead, run to your little church, pray that I am not there. However; rest assured that I am there. You can feel me. I’m inside you. I’m in your head, in your heart, and your soul. I’m pulsing through your veins, I’m giving life where there was none before, and you know it. I’m always there. Right there beside you. You can find me in your house, and your bed. At church I’m sitting in the pew behind you, or standing at the pulpit, hanging from the cross. Oh please, spare me the dramatics. No. No. No, I would never hurt you. Just mocking you, laughing in your face. I’m just a little voice inside your head, a tiny little demon on your shoulder. I’m just that remaning giult of humanity that you can not wash away. < !signature--> Just an effigy to be disgraced, to be defaced. Your need for me has been replaced. [This message has been edited by Effigy (edited 07-31-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 wes wiggins - All Rights Reserved | |||
TerryW Senior Member
since 2000-03-23
Posts 779Louisville, Mississippi, USA |
Effigy~ Very powerful and deep words, my friend. You have given me much to ponder with this one. Great writing! ~you reached inside, you touched my heart, and I am all the better for it~ Terry A. Woodson, Jr. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
This sizzles...oooh...I like. |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Effigy* I've fought with this voice myself from time to time...as almost everyone has, you hit the mark with this one...powerful and haunting. |
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Effigy Member
since 2000-04-11
Posts 486disbelief |
Well I'm glad to see that you all found this so powerful, deep, and haunting. (Sounds like a movie review.) Thanks for reading |
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littleC Junior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 21 |
Wow! Powerful!! Absolutly wonderful! What a gift you have!! littleC |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
i also say *WOW*...well stated! |
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forne_marin Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140Spartanburg, South Carolina |
I'm surprised how much religious imagry is in your poetry. Ah, well. Very powerful, very dark, very moving piece. I like it. My only critique is that you should change the following lines: "So go ahead, run to your little church,/pray that I am not there./However; rest assured that I am there." I would suggest, "So go ahead, run to your little church,/pray that I do not follow./However; rest assured that I am there." *(OR)* "So go ahead, run to your little church,/pray that I am not there./However; rest assured that I am." |
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