Open Poetry #9 |
The obolisk of butterfly |
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
The obelisk of butterfly Under cover of the night Mystic spills from out extreme Desires flash into light Making panache of the dream. Generating worlds in air Beyond the real of know how Building with the minds declare Moved by just a thoughts endow. Laid upon a scale of blue Floats a rainbow in the sky Does not have the weight of coup Only fragile of the sigh. But in this valley of serene Lies the meaning of the scheme Lies the essence of our green Lies the message of our dream. Paint the butterfly full hue For that butterfly is you. |
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© Copyright 2000 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
Chanson Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559Up Creek w/Out Paddle |
You penned lovely images here, Seymour. I'm glad to have gotten a glimpse. Very beautiful ...chanson~ Music, tonal clear & pure, Caresses the harshest of curves. -Song of Gesture |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Chansondegeste, Thank you so much for the read and comment. |
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Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Beautiful message and imagery. This poem is magical. How I love butterflies and you captured the spirit of them so well as a metaphor for your love for her and the journey. You've taken the essence of the butterfly to new levels with two representations in this poem. And I love the title! I love the ending: "Paint the butterfly full hue for that butterfly is you" Take care, Melissa Honeybee The beauty of poetry gives my soul wings to fly free within dreams |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
"Paint the butterfly full hue For that butterfly is you." --Absolutley exquisite Seymour. These are indeed magical words. < !signature--> *Krista Knutson* "Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart." -Confucious [This message has been edited by Alwye (edited 09-18-2000).] |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Butterflies seem to be running wild here in the forums...a lovely view. This is beautiful and tenderly written..excellent work~ |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Laid upon a scale of blue Floats a rainbow in the sky Does not have the weight of coup Only fragile of the sigh. But in this valley of serene Lies the meaning of the scheme Lies the essence of our green Lies the message of our dream. Paint the butterfly full hue For that butterfly is you. ======================= Has anybody told you latley that you ROCK!! "Does not have the weight of coup Only fragile of the sigh." you need to be butterfly kissed for that line AWESOME POEM Sy-guy... so very cool....... later-metamorphisis-gator me |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Does not have the weight of coup Only fragile of the sigh. But in this valley of serene Lies the meaning of the scheme Lies the essence of our green Lies the message of our dream. Paint the butterfly full hue For that butterfly is you. Beautiful words from you. No surprise at all though. Seems that Monday is a great day for butterflies. Loved the above lines especially....classic poetic treasures they are. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Melissa, A beautiful comment. Alwye, Your comment made me fly. Butterfly, Well you should know about butterflies. Janet, Thank you for the awesome. *L* Mark, Always enjoy your remarks. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I'll trade you some panache for a little elan... thank you Sy...for reminding us to look out the windows to check the butterflies' flight... |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Sy - I know I've said this many times before, but I really love the way you work with words! You use such unexpected combinations that make so much sense when they appear. This poem is a perfect example - totally unpredicatable phrasing, yet so tightly constructed that, after reading the poem, I realize that every word is used perfectly. Your writing reminds me of Mozart. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Subshine, You have both. *L* LngJhnAg, My oh my that is quite a comment. Thank you much. |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Under cover of the night Mystic spills from out extreme Desires flash into light Making panache of the dream. beautiful poem, wonderfully written. The softest thing in the world Will overcome the hardest.Non-being can enter where there is no space". Taoist saying |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Exquisitely written Love Liz |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Brian, Thanks for the nice comment. Elizabeth, Thanks for the exquisite. Love Sy |
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