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Open Poetry #9
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My Motives Unclear
| Open Poetry #9 |
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My Motives Unclear |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia 
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Many days I sit and ponder your thoughts With a question in my mind,and a laugh in my heart You amuse me,confuse me,and oft entertain Left in awe, wanting to sing praise, but i choose to refrain. Every word lingering,hanging heavy in air But the ink remains silent, no whispers can I hear So with my eyes,I drink deep,to relish the taste Leaving no image unsavoured,not one letter left to waste. What brings me to you, whats pulling me near? The answer evades me, the motives unclear Maybe because I've seen him dancing in your eyes Or felt his voice echoed behind your cryptic rhymes Somehow,someway you remind me of him And I bask in your radiance to be close to him again But still my heart beats empty, Im aching within Because I know in my soul Im commiting a sin You are not him,you are unique, I know this is true Onward from now,when i read your poems, Im reading just you! Ill no longer take for granted the person you are Youre a welcomed inspiration admired from afar. ~Dawn |
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| © Copyright 2000 Dawn van Krieken - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Poutprincess, What elequent words you have written in this work of yours. Once again, I am glad that I stopped by to see you. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
well, poutprincess, I just read one of your responses... look I have followed you this time...  okay back to business... Bill already used the word "eloquent"... so I will just say... Well written... regards, sudhir. |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
Bill: im tickled you came by to see me! thank you so much for the kind words! Sudhir: all night, every time ive gone to make a response, there you are one step ahead of me! i do say though, that you are most welcomed here...and your comments are always a joy to recieve! |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
And I admire this poem...James |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
poutprincess.. Is it wishful thinking when we're drawn to certain people because they remind us of one we cannot have? It's always hard to step back and see the person for who they really are, and you put this growing process into words so touching........ Your work intrigues me...... I appreciate your individualism! I have but one goal in life......... To make you smile! ~~ Sunny ~~ |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Every word lingering,hanging heavy in air But the ink remains silent, no whispers can I hear So with my eyes,I drink deep,to relish the taste Leaving no image unsavoured,not one letter left to waste. What brings me to you, whats pulling me near? The answer evades me, the motives unclear Maybe because I've seen him dancing in your eyes Or felt his voice echoed behind your cryptic rhymes Somehow,someway you remind me of him And I bask in your radiance to be close to him again But still my heart beats empty, Im aching within Because I know in my soul Im commiting a sin ================= this is such excellent honest sincere piece of writing and i feel like you read my mind and heart when writing it... thanks so much for your kind replies to my work...Im still catching up. take care jm |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
"Leaving no image unsavoured,not one letter left to waste." This is what I feel when reading your poems. Another gem, wonderfully written. "I am melancholy, flower cutting through stone" manic street preachers |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
jmlee: thank you for your reply, has helped brighten my day! Sunny1: you just put the biggest smile on my face..me "intriguing"? i will always be searching out your poetry, and im so happy youve found mine! Thank You! Janet Marie: ah, thank you thank you thank you! what a huge compliment that was...now another smile on my face! brian: thank you my friend, that means alot to me...you are divine!! |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Dawn, I love this, what an interesting topic, and I have been guilty of the same. Great poem Catalinamoon |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Dawn, I admire your writings much, I especially like your honest introspection-- always a challenge, but to write it down? I admire you thrice... |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
dawn, i loved this...the title grabed my attention and your words are certainly my inspiration! i loved this the most... "Every word lingering,hanging heavy in air But the ink remains silent, no whispers can I hear So with my eyes,I drink deep,to relish the taste Leaving no image unsavoured,not one letter left to waste." wow...there is talent for you...hope to read more! salooma |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
*BLUSH* Catalinamoon: oh thank you very much for your reply, its nice someone found me "interesting"! Serenity:i've always admire your poems as well..and i have to say that im "over the moon" with you telling me you admire mine! thank you so much! Salooma:you are very kind, thank you. i dont recognize your name...but you can bet in no time flat...im going to seek out some of your poetry! thanks again! whatcha doing in this darkness baby when you know love will set you free? will you stay in the sea forever Drowning there for all eternity? ~Live |
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Tess Member
since 2000-03-22
Posts 288Australia |
I enjoyed reading the moral dilemma in this poem. Sometimes I wonder what it is that draws us to people, is it a reminder of a lost love, a past love, and to be able to admit that, well you speak the unspoken in this poem I think. Wonderful! "A clay pot sitting in the sun will always be a clay pot. It has to go through the white heat of the furnace to become porcelain." --Mildred W. St |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
Tess: thank you so much for stopping by with your kind words! |
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JnR4eva Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377Bronx, NY |
poutprincess, your poem has left me speechless. It is so true what you speak of. Wow what an amazing poem. It was beautiful  |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Its easy to let yourself see someone elses reflection in a new lovers eyes...making comparisons can ruin a beautiful thing and you seem to have realized that... |
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Majestic Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 264houston, tx. |
truly a beautiful poem...i loved every line..such honest expression..well done.. "To live is to love; To truly LOVE is to live!" ~kg~ |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
JnR4eva: Thank you! you are very generous indeed, and I do appreciate it! And allow me to give you a warm welcome into Passions! You'll make many friends here! Paula: oh I certainly have realized, took awhile to learn that lesson though! Thank you so much for stopping in! Majestic: Thank you! you are a new face to me (i think), will be looking for your poetry to find out who the person is behind this lovely response! whatcha doing in this darkness baby when you know love will set you free? will you stay in the sea forever Drowning there for all eternity? ~Live |
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Jenn E Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589Kelowna, BC, Canada |
You are so unique, this poem just proves that. Reminds me we really do have to look at people for who they are and not who we want them to be....a mistake we have all made. Well written words you have here......and I enjoyed reading them. Jenn E |
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SpitFire Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396 |
~Dawn,...allow me to step in line here behind all the others to recognize your talent here. This is a gentle and kind message. So honest,....and so huge hearted to realize and take action for this 'other's' being. This is great. Thank you kindly for sharing. Take care Gurl. *Peace. *BTW,...super title! |
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Eddie de Jong Junior Member
since 2000-07-31
Posts 27 |
Dawn, Yes I think we have all had times that the motives were not totally clear. Lovely expression of the process, I love it. Especially the line: Ill no longer take for granted the person you are should be applied more in all relationships. E |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
Jenn E: thank you for enjoying, and thank you for finding me unique! Spitfire: you have a big heart yourself. youve been very supportive of me....and you are certainly appreciated!! Eddie: I agree, we should never take anyone or anything for granted. Thank you so much! ~Dawn whatcha doing in this darkness baby when you know love will set you free? will you stay in the sea forever Drowning there for all eternity? ~Live |
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JSage Member
since 2000-08-25
Posts 91Nashua, NH USA |
this is beautiful... I think we've all looked for someone in someone else at one point. To acknowledge makes you an incredibally honest person and your honesty shines in your poetry. -Jes |
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poutprincess Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735Perth, Western Australia, Australia |
Jes: wow, you brought another one of mine back from the dead! Thank you so much for reading my poetry, means alot to me. ~Dawn< !signature--> "Steady as it comes, right down to you, I've said it all, so maybe we're a Bliss of another kind" Bliss-Tori Amos [This message has been edited by poutprincess (edited 08-31-2000).] |
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