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suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana

0 posted 2000-09-15 10:31 PM


Ordinarily, I would not have posted the first poem of this duet... For one thing, Toe would yell and fuss. *G* (But a gal's gotta do what a gal's gotta do... and if that's what it takes to get him back in here....  *EG* Right? *G*) For another, it probably belongs in Dark... and last, it's not a work that gives me any pride of creation... I was perfectly content to subject a couple of friends to it (I have NO mercy *G*) and forget about it. But today, the second poem was born as I almost became a grease spot on a city street... and the poems seemed (to me, at least) to go together... Question and answer, shout and echo... suthern and belle... (oops, that last just typed itself *G*)

Conjugation of Me

My arms stretch high
But my feet are lead.
I'm torn apart
Wishing I was dead.
I'm so tired of
This indecision.
I earn myself
My own derision.
I don't know who I am anymore.

I'm desperate
For a kind word
I smile a plea
And feel absurd.
"Take me home
Help me forget
How lonely my
Four walls can get."
I don't care who I was anymore.

I cry for help
Ruin someone's slumber.
I might have known -
Just a wrong number.
Downward spiral
Picks up speed.
How can I hush this
Creature in need?
I don't guess I will be anymore.

------------------------------------------------

                ANOTHER STEP

WALK signal beckoned me to cross the street.
I started across on tired, aching feet
When to my surprise and dismay did meet
Someone running a red light.

Screams of "Stop! Watch out!!" I barely could hear
As terror rushed through me, I tasted fear.
My thighs felt heat as the car brushed so near;
I really had quite a fright.

As I gathered my wits, purse, lunch and keys
And walked on to work with trembling knees,
I thought of how quickly and with such ease
My life could have ended there.

I realized that I don’t want to die
Even if buckets of tears I do cry.
I simply wish I could say a goodbye
To pain it seems I can’t bear.

My longing for happiness seems absurd
When every moment and each breath hurts,
But something inside me still says the words
I’m glad that I’m alive.

Another step - I’d not be here today
But I do not want to end things this way
So hear me now, for I have this to say
This woman will survive!


© Copyright 2000 suthern - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2000-09-15 10:40 PM


Suthern,
What would I do without you? *L* Sy
Wonderful writing.

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
2 posted 2000-09-15 10:42 PM


Oh Ruth, you bring tears to my eyes! My dear you still sound so very unhappy.  

I'm glad that you're still here, and that one more step you didn't take. Ruth I just wanna reach out and give you some great big (((((HUGS)))))

If I could give you a world of happiness I would, smiles along with it all I would.
Skies of blue, and sunshine always I would!

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2000-09-15 10:44 PM


dittoing Sy, but adding

what would WE do without you?

Let us all know, are you OK?

Hugs, my Suthern friend...

Karilea
When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
4 posted 2000-09-15 11:01 PM


Suthern Belle, you've just written about the old addage of "Be careful what you wish for....you may get it." - and you've done it very well indeed.

I ain't gonna comment on the line I want to comment on but I wanna! I'll save it for LJA  

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
5 posted 2000-09-15 11:13 PM


It takes a certain courage to write your heart, but isn't it wonderful that you can do it in such a beautiful way. Yes, it's good to be alive, no matter the pain, for that is a variable that changes, and on the other side, there is joy in the exact same measurement.
Thank you for sharing these poems
Take care and keep writing
I'll never forget your beautiful voice
Liz

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

6 posted 2000-09-16 12:05 PM


Suthern, I'm so very glad you didn't take one more step. Yes, the pain can seem unbearable at times, but as Elizabeth says, the joy on the other side will abundantly make up for it. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS

Denise

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
7 posted 2000-09-16 09:30 AM


Thank you all very much for your comments. *S*

Sy, Dovey, Sunshine, & Denise: I'm fine... not always perky, but you're not getting rid of me yet! LOL. I'll admit I was shaken up... On the other hand, the driver sped on, ignoring red lights, oblivious to the fact that he'd almost acquired a large, unattractive hood ornament for his Camaro! *G* (And his timing was lousy... I won't have insurance for another 2 weeks! LOL)

Liz: I enjoyed that talk so much! *S* I'm gonna have to see if I can find some calling cards for our dear Pepper person... she seems to have bought all of them in her area. *G*

Deer one: That adage is why I keep on hoping for Toe! LOL (Among other reasons *G*) As for your non-comment... yanno, it's inconsiderate to point out (even by implication *G*) that I didn't have many wits to gather! LOL

Thanks again, everyone... for reading and for caring! *S*

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
8 posted 2000-09-16 09:40 AM


Belle - I didn't want to comment on that line, but 'Deer left me with no choice.  Do your thighs really feel heat when you get near a car?  Do your dates know this?  Has 'Deer tried to offer you any rides?  Great poetry from a wonderful poet.
doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
9 posted 2000-09-16 10:18 AM


both of these were well written... from the heart of a poet... thank you for sharing these  
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
10 posted 2000-09-16 10:44 AM


suthern--perhaps that car was a wake up call, a big motorized angel push...into seeing life just one step different...great poetry, girl...and a big hug!
Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

11 posted 2000-09-19 09:54 AM


first I gotta say............
rofg@LJ and the heat on your thigh.......
ok..now I have composed myself, I gotta say....lol...you should have known it would be your thighs they picked out instead of your wits ....which I might say are great....am so glad to read this....great writing too btw....and yep...one of those friends that you subjected it too was gonna write and say how great it was and that you should post it and   glad you did

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