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Open Poetry #9
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049

0 posted 2000-09-15 08:59 PM

This was posted a long time ago and not very many read it... well, Severn read it twice, anyway, I was feeling this way again thought I would repost it...thanks

The Sky Admirer

Sometimes I wish
that I could find
an empty land
where I could stand
in the desert dust,
swim on a glass lake.
I could be
a serene swan
or a lily,
the sky my admirer.

But one lone lily
hears no laughter,
a swan
in a lake without ripples
feels no touch
and the sky does not admire me
I admire the sky.

Still, sometimes I wish
that I could find
an empty land
that I could fill,
where sweet stars fall
and noble deeds grow
and songs sing each to each
and home is the heart.

[This message has been edited by Martie (edited 09-16-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
1 posted 2000-09-15 09:06 PM

Wow! I sure don't know why it didn't get many replies. I think it's excellent. We all have wishes like these but we can't express them so eloquently.....
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
2 posted 2000-09-15 09:06 PM

Martie if you ever find such a place, I'll join you! Home is the heart, and you certainly touched mine with this one!  
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
3 posted 2000-09-15 09:08 PM

Now my friend....everyone knows that a lily on a lake with no ripples is being caressed under the surface(the heart) by the "soft" current of water and the tickling of the fish as they nibble.  Beautiful write my friend and I have read this in the archives but am so glad that you brought it up again.

hugging your heart in the calmness under the surface.

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
4 posted 2000-09-15 09:17 PM

Martie -

I've often felt similar thoughts - the desire for that solitary place. where one can be or not be - just the sky and peace - You've expressed this so very well - it deserved a second exposure

~You have to have a dream so you can get up in the morning.

~ Billy Wilder

Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
5 posted 2000-09-15 09:31 PM

Of course the sky is your admirer! *S* Why else does a blush appear across the heavens? Why else do the stars twinkle and the sun glow? *S*

OK, OK... whimsy aside... Even the sky would admire a talent such as yours!! This is beautiful!

Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125
North Carolina
6 posted 2000-09-15 09:36 PM

Oh Martie this is simply beautiful...Such lovely images it brought to mind.

X Angel
Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521
7 posted 2000-09-15 09:51 PM

If you find such a place call me, I'm off to pack....oh and I think I know a place....that island where they have the Castaways in Britain.
It's so beautiful, and the color of the water on some of the beaches is spectacular.


PS this was wunnerful

Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
8 posted 2000-09-16 12:55 PM

Balladeer--thanks for being so sweet.

Whtdove...Yes, home is the heart.

Mark--thanks for the hug and for a seeing what I didn't see.

Bill--Thank you for always responding in such a wonderful way.

suthern--that is about the most wonderful thing anyone has ever said...thank you for that.

juls--I'm glad you liked this...thank you so much for letting me know.

Heather--you are too cute...let's go!

since 2000-07-06
Posts 468
WA, Australia
9 posted 2000-09-16 03:48 AM

~This was wonderfull. So beautifully written too. I enjoyed this alot!!~


Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
10 posted 2000-09-16 07:31 AM

This is so pretty and so serene.
Catches me admiring the morning sky.

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~

Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

11 posted 2000-09-16 09:27 AM

Very beautifully done, Martie! I'm sorry I missed it the first time around but I'm glad I caught it this time!


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