Open Poetry #9 |
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Another Lonely Night |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Woke up this morning Sun in my eyes Feeling you gone Feeling surprised Your leaving caught me Quite unaware One moment you want me The next you're not there And it looks like Its gonna be another lonely night without you Yeah it looks like I've spent a lot of love in vain Yes it looks like Its gonna be another lonely night without you And I just dont know that I can stand the pain Feling so lonely Feeling so blue How can I go on Alone without you I don't understand this We are of one heart Now you deny me Now we're apart And it looks like Its gonna be another lonely night without you Yeah it looks like I've spent a lot of love in vain Yes it looks like Its gonna be another lonely night without you And I just don't know that I can stand the pain |
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© Copyright 2000 Paula Finn - All Rights Reserved | |||
Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Paula, It looks like this is going to be another tear jerker from you. I loved it. Be well Kethry. "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- |
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Trew Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Ottawa, Canada |
Paula, You captured the shock of losing. That "Oh, no..." feeling in your chest. Empty and cold. *sigh* Beautifully written... Trev. |
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American Princess Junior Member
since 2000-08-21
Posts 49USA |
Paula, You described that terrible feeling beautifully. It sounds like a song... American Princess It's only me, thinking out loud... |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Good morning Paula, I came by and read your poem, and I read your many meaningful words. Alone is the torment, and a smile is a grace. To write like you do, you have a lot to share. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Paula, Forget about the lonely that's good writing. *L* |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Paula~ Haunting melody of the night. Well sung. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Kethry...thank you and please dont cry... Trev,,,its so good having you back, commenting on my poetry...I always trust and value your opinions so...thank you American Princess...it actually is a song...and thank you Bill...its always a pleasure to have you stop by and an honor to have you read...thanks Seymour...thank you sir coming from you that is quite the compliment Marge...thank you gifted lady...I am glad you could hear the music in this one |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Paula... A beautiful song it is!! Do you sing, too? We could do a duet, my friend, I love doing harmonies!!! This one just flowed from the very beginning...and I loved the Chorus! Very, very nice work! Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Very heartfelt song and would be great as a "country" top charter. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Paula reminds me that so many relationships are just like this...perhaps one party wanting a commitment and the other only looking for some fun without any responsibilities...one destined to be hurt and the other ready to move on with the next opportunity presenting itself...James |
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vandana![]()
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
I liked it a lot!!!!!! ![]() |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
sing it, strum it, play it on the 88's.... this, my friend, is a SONG!!! lyrical and wonderful.. thanks for the read ![]() |
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Jeffrey Carter![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
I would have to agree with Doreen on this one This sounds like a song to me ![]() |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Sunny...yes I sing and I love to harmonize...thanks Mark...I dont know abt that but thanks James...all I know is it hurts ...thanks for reading Vandana...thank you lots Doreen...yes it is and one I have carried around a long time...thank you Jeffrey...you know it is |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Paula I know that lonely nights hurt...and I feel for you hon...if he appreciates you like you deserve he'll be back...James |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
James...you are always a source of comfort to me...thank you my friend |
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JulieAnn Senior Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 754Earth 3rd Rock from the sun!! |
Paula..I liked this alot....do you write music?? I NEED to learn!! ![]() Julie :) |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
JulieAnn...no I dont write music...this one sings in my head but...lol...check out redwriter she is an exceptional songwriter |
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CAMERON UNDERWOOD Junior Member
since 2000-08-31
Posts 26 |
I know your pain all too well. She cut out my heart and I'll have deal. All too true. Very touching. I'd loved it. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Paula, This is very touching... regards and take care, sudhir |
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CocoBaci Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043 |
Hi Paula, a very compelling poem... Touched my heart this one... Coco |
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Marsha![]()
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Paula this is ace writing. A beautiful and hauntingly sad song, which you have captured perfectly. Well done, take care ![]() |
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ma miller Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806 |
as others have said above, this should be a song ... well done, Paula ... |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Cameron...welcome to Passions and thank you for letting mine be one of your first reads...I look forward to reading your works soon...you need to talk? email me ok? Sudhir...thank you my friend you always have a good word for me Coco...Im glad I could touch you...thanks Marsha...I appreciate you reading my work and your comments are always eagerly looked forward to Mark...coming from you friend thats a great compliment...glad you could hear the music ( it actually is a song) |
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Auguste![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Hi Paula, Such sadness you convey here, dear friend. I wish all my very best. Michael Proust- "Love is space and time measured by the heart" |
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JnR4eva Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 377Bronx, NY |
hello paula...lovely style ![]() i notice that this is not the typical kind of poetry im used to reading from you ![]() ![]() nice flow..i imagined a lover at her bed...probably looking at a picture of her ex and just saying those lines to herself...nicely done ![]() "my love is my motivation my love is my inspiration perception of this poem is your interpretation" -- rlt |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I loved the form of this poem, content as well. Very well done but if you're feeling too lonely, tune in to one of Wilfred's poems. You'll forget about being lonely in a hurry liz |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
I hear this as a song, it's very lyrical. Got one thing to say about someone who loves and leaves us, kiss him/her goodbye! Corinne |
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