Open Poetry #9 |
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Two Steps Forward - One Step Where? |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada ![]() |
Two Steps Forward - One Step Where? "Two steps forward, one step back", the story of my life ... Not sure I'm making progress here, with all this stress and strife; In motion though, I always am, that's one good thing I guess, I just can't find the meaning here, in all life's little tests. I take a step, a timid one, to check the waters out ... I try to get my courage up, to quell this mind of doubt; "I made it! Phew!" That's positive, "OK, one more, let's try!" A shaky foot moves forward ... but I yank it back and sigh. "Just give me strength!" I beg aloud, "I'm trying! Can't you see?" I hesitate and fumble with my inner agony; I argue back and forth inside these walls that I have built, I struggle just to come to terms with cards that I've been dealt. "Let's try again", I hear me say ... I inch ahead a bit; My foot, it hovers motionless, "Don't let it down just yet!" A quarrel in my head ensues ... the positive has won! So there, I place my foot right down ... it's too late now to run. I look about, to left and right, I quickly scan with eyes ... To search for something out of skew, to bring upon demise; I wait to see if skies will fall, or earth to break apart, Beneath my trembling feet as I take stand there, with my heart. But all is quiet, all is calm, an eerie peace surrounds This woeful creature as I hold my breath, where I am bound; Another moment passes, feel it's been eternity; I slowly let my breath exhale, "Perhaps this time I'm free!" But wait! There's something moving, from the corner of my eye, My heart contracts, I squint to see my nemesis nearby; It skulks there 'neath the shadows, as I try to get my grip ... "Don't let it eat you up this time!", I murmur 'neath my lips. "Stay strong ... take hold!", I clench my fists, and ready for the fight, Then seconds later, out it flies, straight at me ... all it's might! "Just hold your ground! Don't move an inch! Don't take that one step back!", "You've come so far, don't let it know the courage that you lack!" "Oh Lord!", it's coming closer now, upon me, soon 'twill be ... The arguments rage deep within my mind, in silent scream; I raise my foot (will be the last), go forward ... or retreat??? For forward lies my future, but if back ... admit defeat. No seconds left to quarrel now, my foot is perched mid-air, It lunges, "This is it!" I cry ... and plant my foot right "there". /Kit McCallum |
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© Copyright 2000 Kit McCallum - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Does this scream anxiety or what!? Well done, Kit...very well done! |
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Jenn E Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589Kelowna, BC, Canada |
You have captured a real feeling and written it perfectly.......I so feel this. The ending was priceless. Just a AWSOME write. In my library it goes...... ![]() Jenn E |
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rosepetals25![]()
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076PA |
Kit, Have you been reading my thoughts today? This poem fits in SO well with my life right now it is almost frightening..lol. I can completely relate to you amazing accuracy. Very well done.. I loved it ![]() rp25 |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Kit this is nothing short of superb....I hope you are going to do a book submit with this one......absolutely superb. I felt the anxiety all the way through. In my library as well. Your best I've seen be far and that was no easy task. ![]() |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
EVEN BETTER YET!!!!!!! I am giving JM a pass of leave as I THINK SHE NEEDS TO READ THIS ONE. ![]() |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
Kit..... The ending was the clencher!!! Get those feet moving forward, and if you move them fast enough they don't have a chance to go in reverse!!!!!!!!!!! As Always, great writing!! Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
thank you my sweet warden for telling me to come read this... yes...i needed to... Kit ..you already know you have penned me with this poem of wisdom and reality... I am ALWAYS...my own worst enemy... why do we do this to oursleves... why can we be strong for others and not for ourselves... why ask why... ![]() excellent poem of angst, and anxiety ... you have nailed the way it feels to be afraid of our own shadow... it helps to know we're not alone ... thank you for the quiet comfort. LATER-NOT-SCARED-ANYMORE-GATOR (haha...HAD to get one of those in for YOU) ok ok...im going... See I was good Mark...can i have ice cream tonite ![]() |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Great writing, miss Kit. Two steps forward and one back aren't really that bad. The reverse is much tougher. ![]() ![]() |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kit~ Wonderfully done. One can sense the indecisiveness of the next step ... and the strength in having taken it ! ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
MOST AMAZINGLY DONE.... +2-1=1 that's positively positive... GREAT... Kit, I really do enjoy your writes... regards, sudhir |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
~Sunshine: Thank you so much for the great comment Sunshine, and thanks for finding this … by the time I closed down the computer, it was still at zero responses, and onto page 3! Ack! I was thinking, boy this one must really stink!!! ![]() ~Jenn: Thank you Jenn … what a wonderful comment! If I didn't feel this one, I couldn't have written it for sure! Much appreciation! ![]() ~Rosepetals: I'm so glad you enjoyed this one Rospetals … but oh boy … they were my thoughts yesterday, straight from an episode of my life … glad to know I'm not alone! ![]() ~Mark: Wow Mark! Thank you soooooo much! What an inspiring response to receive. Very appreciative here for these wonderful thoughts! ![]() ~Mark: OK … if you could top the wonderful comment above, you just did with JM's permission slip! That means a LOT to me Mark! Thank you! ![]() ~Sunny: Thank you so much Sunny! I sometimes feel like a cartoon character, where the feet are spinning in big circles and he stays in the same spot! LOL! ![]() ~Janet Marie: I'm so glad Mark pointed you here JM! Sigh … I know, I know ... now let's stop being our own worst enemies shall we … make a pact! Take care sweet gator-lady … love ya! (that'll hold me for a while) ![]() ~Balladeer: Aaahhh, but I know the reverse also Balladeer … it's just so painfully slow this way, but at least it's forward. Somehow I hope to pick up some momentum … thank you Balladeer! Much appreciation! ![]() ~Marge: I'm so glad it came across OK Marge, thank you for letting me know. This one just scooted off the "brain of turmoil" straight to the pen, and I wasn't sure if it was going to hit the mark. Thank you for this great response Marge! Very much appreciated! ![]() ~Sudhir: Oh Sudhir … I really do enjoy "your" responses! +2-1=1 … GREAT way to sum it up. Thanks Sudhir!!! Very grateful I am! ![]() *And a little note to all … I'm sorry if I've missed responding to some great poetry lately, but things have been hectic … I hope to play catch-up soon!!! With much appreciation to all, /Kit |
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English Rose Member
since 2000-08-20
Posts 211Berkshire, England |
Kit...I have enjoyed reading your poems and this is no exception...another good write! |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Oh boy Kit have I ever been here! This is wonderful, as always. Bonnie |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
~English Rose: Thank you so much for reading English Rose ... and for this lovely response! ![]() ~Bonnie: Been there, done that, eh Bonnie? Me too, me too! Much appreciated! ![]() With much appreciation to you both, /Kit |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
All righty then - Kit with two feet planted firmly on the ground... I know I'm not messin' with her... ![]() |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
~Nan: No messing with the ones already messed up now ... wouldn't be fair! ![]() ![]() Much appreciation, /Kit |
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