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Open Poetry #9
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LongJohn Cheats Death
| Open Poetry #9 |
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LongJohn Cheats Death |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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LongJohn said 'night to his daughter Followed her up the stairs Then stood outside her bedroom door To listen to her prayers. "God bless mommy. God bless daddy" Was what his daughter said... "God bless grandma...goodbye, grandpa.." Next day grandpa fell down dead!!!!! Must be coincidence, LongJohn thought Just that and nothing more But that next night he once again Was at her bedroom door. "God bless mommy...God bless daddy" He heard her small voice say "Goodbye, grandma" she went on... Grandma died the very next day!!!!  LongJohn was quite beside himself. Twice in a row was queer!! That night again he stood outside And strained his ears to hear. "God bless mommy. Goodbye, daddy..." LongJohn began to shake!! He couldn't sleep. He tossed about And spent the night awake. Next morning he dressed carefully.. He didn't even shave! He vowed to take no chances that Could put him in his grave. He drove to work 5 miles per hour His head moved to and fro. If any car came up too close He'd stop and let him go. No elevator for him today He walked up flights of stairs Locked all doors to his office Not to be caught unaware. He drove back home the same slow way Head swiveling on his neck And, by the time he reached his house, He was a nervous wreck! He climbed the stairs so carefully To be sure not to fall Then almost fell down from relief Against the kitchen wall. His wife said, "Hey, what's up with you? You look like one big mess!" LongJohn said, "Honey, you don't know How weak I feel from stress." "YOU'RE stressed?!" she screamed. "I've had a day That shook me to the core! "This morning the milkman tripped and fell And died at our front door!!!!" |
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| © Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
ROFLMAO-----ohhhh chuckle chuckle....you sir are a wonderful mess of words yourself. This was a wonderful thing to be put into my day. Great one as usual. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You GUYS! Yup, Yup, must be a "GUY" thing! |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Balladeer~ Excellent! ROFLMAO!! Very Good!  -SEALive,Love,Laugh :) ~SueB |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Balladeer~ <  I'm sure that there were 'exterminating' circumstances ! ! ~*Marge*~< !signature--> ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com [This message has been edited by Marge Tindal (edited 08-31-2000).] |
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AVANTI Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 664INDIA/MAHARASHTRA/PUNE |
intresting sequence of deaths... If I should fall again, then they will laugh but what if just this one I rise? Avanti Rao |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Oh, isn't this just the biggest piece of "swell" poetry I have EVER read! What a pack of lies. Does this qualify for ICQ gossip, or what!??? But, on the other hand, lil Lorelei HAS been going through the milk lately.... hmmm... No wonder her picture is on the carton with the words, BEWARE! oh oh... here comes lil Lorelei now... gotta post this before she... urk... hands... on... my.... neck... againnnnnnnnnnnnn. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
ROTFLMAO...PPPPSSSTTTTTT...LngJhn...check see if "deer has a uniform!!!!HAHAHAHA...just kidding guys...this was so much fun |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
This one was fun. Excellently done 'Deer.Kethry "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- |
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CAVECANEM Junior Member
since 2000-08-05
Posts 43Nevada USA |
TS Eliot said " Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood" Gentlemen you all do this very well...keep it up....as I'm sure you will..... Ken |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
priceless... !!!  "goodbye" can be a hard thing, sometimes, y'know? geez.... ROFL... too funny! Great job, Michael! you guys are too much...  |
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linda munday Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 315Adelaide, Australia |
You could probably have heard me laugh from where you are..... it's hard to type when you're rolling on the floor Brilliant as usual Balladeer. Take care, Linda Munday |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Thanks to all for enjoying my little foolishness. The younger poets are saying "milkman? What's that?" Gee, I hate to date myself so.....oh, well. Paula, the fact that I DO have an old milkman uniform is purely coincidental!!!!! |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
This gave me the much needed laugh that I've been looking for all day!!!!!! Thank you, Mr. 'Deer'!!!!!! Today is a gift.... That is why they call it 'the Present'! |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
I'm on the floor laughing with everyone else! "The heart and soul have no illusion of boundries when friendship is the quest" ~ My Angel. |
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Honey Bunch Member
since 2000-08-08
Posts 99South Africa |
This was a good laugh...but - ouch! - the floor is hard! |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
Seems like I've read this one before 'Deer, but It is still a wonderful piece!! Very funny!!!! Bridgette "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
ROFL! Very funny! And hey...I DO know what a milkman is! Elizabeth |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
what an ending! A good one. Deb |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
Baladeer -- I'm me and I know I'd hate to date you.... so I can imagine how you must feel... ROFL..  Nice bodyslam here..!! |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
hehehehehehe.....Milkman huh??? It MUST be the uniform!!! I'm just sitting here guffawing.....Great read! Bonnie |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
oh my! ball-a-deer strikes again, and with such passion! You're still the king yanno, but only cuz I've been saving up for my return to the throne...How ya been prick? Hope things are going well ferya...take care and keep LongJohn on his toes will ya? |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
ROFL! Great read Balladeer! Loved the ending ... woven with your incredible flair and wit as always!Best wishes, /Kit |
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juliet_2u Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125North Carolina |
Oh my gawddddddddddddddd.....ROTF...You never cease to crack me up. What would this place be without you my dear 'Deer??? Fantastic read. Juls [This message has been edited by juliet_2u (edited 09-02-2000).] |
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