Open Poetry #9 |
vanished |
Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
I walked - Travelled with I; Twin, all alone Solitary seclusion I talked - Echoed in I; Thought single Estranged isolation I touched - Feeling the I; Cut right through Banished exclusion So, what's new? Get a grip! Think of the sun Think. Just think. He remains Shining alone, Selflessly, Without friends Through the day - While his Might-have-been friends Come out to play In a canopied Accompaniment, Twinkling in United merriment! Oh, Compared to the Sun's Undicovered Pain My pain is so small My pain is negligible My pain has…vanished [This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 08-28-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
methinks, before anyone noticed this one, this vanished... sorry for the *bump* |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I'm certainly glad you bumped this back up! Charming read! Karilea When you want to be loved, look within...KRJ |
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MMoonchild Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715PA |
I LOVED this..I am my own twin and often am alone with myself..but I loved how you wrote and displayed it ~~soft hugs Maureen |
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juliet_2u Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125North Carolina |
Juls |
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Eloise Senior Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 1096Wyoming |
No apology necessary for the bump...glad you did so. Once again, Sudhir, very well written. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Karilea, Thanks a great deal... I saw this at the end of 3rd page when I checked this one... and thought maybe Ceres had some blues again like the weekend so *bumped* it... Maureen, I am so glad that you loved this one... Thank You Juliet, Thank you so much... for being so appreciative... and a friend Eloise, Many Thanks... regards to all, sudhir |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
I have felt like this before...and no need to apologize...sucha a strong sense off you in this |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thank you Paula for your kind words... regards, sudhir |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
This makes for an interesting read, like three seperate poems in one. I love the rhyme scheme used in the first portion of this. |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thank You Ruth for your read and response too... regards, sudhir |
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Steve B Member
since 2000-08-07
Posts 140Southern PA |
I know these things sighhhh all to well... very well expressed... Steve B |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Sudir my friend, you are a master. Excellent, what a pen you have sir. It's a pleasure to read your work. |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Sudhir, the diversity that you display so ceaselessly in your writing is an amazing thing to witness, to my way of thinking. This piece makes one think, feel, and question. Powerful as well as lovely, my friend. ~ Claire< !signature--> Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau [This message has been edited by Meadowmuse (edited 08-30-2000).] |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Sudhir~ 'While his Might-have-been friends Come out to play In a canopied Accompaniment, Twinkling in United merriment!' Oh, I like this. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Twin all alone Solitary seclusion. Ooooohhh. I liked that *sigh* So glad I didn't miss this one! Kethry "It is the image in the mind that links us to lost treasures; but it is the loss that shapes the image, gathers the flowers weaves the garland."- |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
Sudhir, this is got to be one of my favourites from you. An excellent poem you have penned here. I really like your choice of lines for this one. Marina It is a blessing to have wings for words, and passion in pen Marina Crossley |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Steve... thanks for coming by... Bill... identical feelings here too... Thanks Claire... thanks a great deal... these words have tugged the strings in my heart today... Marge.. if you liked it, I am so much more gladdened... Thanks Kethry, so glad that you found this and then even more that you liked this one... Thanks Marina, you can only imagine, how much this pleases me... Thank you regards to all, sudhir |
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