Open Poetry #9 |
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Forgotten Canvas |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon ![]() |
the frame glinted rich and gold in flickering candlelight as shadows and warmth passed over the canvas contained within on the painting was the heart and soul of a woman her eyes haunted and sad the waves of her hair danced copper in the candle's glow as she stood, an artist's illusion rain pouring down around her water droplets gathering in her hair to course down her cheeks mingling with her tears to slide slowly to the desert sands beneath her feet though, you could only see the tears if you stopped and studied her closely fo so well had the rain hidden them that only the keenest eye could see only the gentlest heart could feel only the kindest ears could hear and as the candlelight danced down the corridor shadows slipping down once more upon that forgotten canvas she stood patiently waiting in endless torrents of rain for another candle to light her darkness |
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© Copyright 2000 Heather Walters - All Rights Reserved | |||
jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Very nice piece...I especially like the way to put together these line... "as she stood, an artist's illusion rain pouring down around her water droplets gathering in her hair to course down her cheeks mingling with her tears" Well done, enjoyed the read. jwesley |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
X Angel, This is fantastic poetry... brilliantly weighed on sentiments with fabulous images... absolutely flipped on the line "danced copper in the candle's glow" loved it so much... WOW regards, sudhir. |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
X angel this is beautiful poetry.. what a scene you have created with the shadows and the candlelight and the painting....wonderful indeed. |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi X Angel, I love this one, wow you did a beautiful job here thanks I really enjoyed. Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. We have to be reminded that He exist!" (Writer Unknown) |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Oh my gosh ... I'm just absolutely taken by this verse XAngel! I could sincerely picture the entire vision, and still see it in my mind's eye as I type. What incredible imagery you've portrayed here. The ending was simply beautiful ... almost haunting! ![]() Best wishes, /Kit |
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X Angel Senior Member
since 1999-11-07
Posts 1521Oregon |
the poem haunts me still, and the meaning to it eludes me....in some odd way, I think it is me I am portraying... Thank you so much guys for your kind replies, you are way too sweet! *hugs* ~Heather |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
You've painted a very vivid picture with your words, Heather! Fabulous writing! Denise |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
"and as the candlelight danced down the corridor shadows slipping down once more upon that forgotten canvas" really great lines, heather... love this! perhaps the muse knows more than you know about yourself and one day you'll figure out this haunting and elusiveness of this one... it's a great poem.. enjoyed it very much ![]() |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
Whoa....very intense imagery here, Heather. Also a good example of cathartic release. I do hope you got it out of your system. If ever ya needs to talk, just drop me a line or two. |
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Marge Tindal![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
XAngel~ I so enjoyed this read. It came alive with the light of the candle. A very, very intriguing write. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Oh - This is lovely - and inspiring - I think I'll go write something...ยง;-) |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
on the painting was the heart and soul of a woman her eyes haunted and sad the waves of her hair danced copper in the candle's glow as she stood, an artist's illusion rain pouring down around her water droplets gathering in her hair to course down her cheeks mingling with her tears to slide slowly to the desert sands beneath her feet ========================= and as the candlelight danced down the corridor shadows slipping down once more upon that forgotten canvas she stood patiently waiting in endless torrents of rain for another candle to light her darkness ======================== oh-girl you are just so good at this.. your gift of descriptive imagery is so awesome... this is simply enchanting and haunting at the same time. excellent... jm There are places inside our souls - that have never been touched. There are places inside our hearts - that need to be loved this much. ~jm~ |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Heather - Tears? Yours? I sincerely hope not. This poem is terrific for the way it places a portrait on my screen even as I read your poem. I can see every detail. But tears? I hope not. |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Heather, this is a very haunting poem, just drew me in. very big WOW here. I bet you could write alot of interesting stories about those treasures you find. Parker |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Heather--I love the scene you have painted ...so vivid with sadness and mystery and beautifully written |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Heather I can only echo all of the above. This is so very beautiful, with so many wonderful images. I just love it. Bonnie |
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