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Alliteration Attempt #2 -- sadness creeping
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Alliteration Attempt #2 -- sadness creeping |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium 
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I just did not want to leave, Slow serpentine walk cumbersome laborious crawling as if carrying heavy mass - Laden. But she had said goodbye -- Sadness swept across froth-like effervescence foaming as if bubbling soap eyes-full - Hurt. Wiped tear brought forth Unready unmoving stilled relentlessly away-driven regressing as if drowning abysmally downward Pained. Just one more, in a sigh ~ hope to hear from you...  |
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| © Copyright 2000 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
Oh this is great! I love the way it flows and the visuals you produced! Nice Job! |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Thank you Debbie .... I liked this one too...  regards, sudhir |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, my ! How quickly you learn ! You caught it and perfected it - 'Slow serpentine walk cumbersome laborious crawling as if carrying heavy mass - Laden. Sudhir~ You draped the mood heavily across my shoulder ... excellent job, my friend. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Marge your kind comments makes me blush... regards, sudhir |
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