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Open Poetry #6
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Forever Out ... For Christie's Heart
| Open Poetry #6 |
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Forever Out ... For Christie's Heart |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Forever OutI have stared forever out and toward the lulling, pulling sea. I have searched within the darkness of the empty ocean of me. I have crawled through days unending with soggy sand in lieu of heart. Through remaining, hulking ruins of castle dreams I'd dared to start. I have turned and walked back slowly to that helpless stone~still child whose innocent eyes upon me, long replaced with something wild, Had given up on the elderfolk and fairy angels she would read to free her from the filthy knotted nettles of demons' deeds. Whose far~off gaze would lie while little arms and knees were muddied to hide the pain of five year old flesh being bruised, ripped open and bloodied. Whose secret prayers and lullabyes could never so much as be heard, though that child, always silent, knew each syllable of every word. And the sometimes when she trusts enough to hold her close to me, are the times I breathe against her and I feel her feel the sea. And the sands are dry and warming now and urging us to start building castles, true and towering, along the beaches of our heart.  Claire |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Claire...this is beautiful. Any poem about the ocean always strikes a chord with me. Nicely done  |
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Rex Allen McCoy Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863Sippin a Timmy's in London |
This is beautiful Claire ... you write with such passion ... it takes my breath away and fills my heart with the song of your choosing Rex}<{{{{o> |
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Fred Hobbs Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 329Tallahassee, Florida, US |
Great poem Claire, I love the imagery and the pace. fh |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Hoot Owl...Thank you. I agree...the ocean is a wonderful metaphorical tool for writers, as within its realm can be found the full range of human emotion. Rex...I'm glad to know your heart is full of music. Thanks for reading. Fred...Thank you, Fred, for your thoughtful response. So glad you enjoyed this one. Claire |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
I have came back and read for the third time and suspect I will return again. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Loud approval here, Claire. This is excellent. What a style you have |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Stunning - absolutely stunning!! My favourite verse - though hard to pick, is this: And the sometimes when she trusts enough to hold her close to me, are the times I breathe against her and I feel her feel the sea. I know that sense of feeling the ocean running through you. K 'Writing sharpens life; life enriches writing' Sylvia Plath |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
My Lady A dream enchantingly painted, that you do The Ocean the Sea a dream come true Your certainly know how to dream in style and art "along the beaches of our heart." This line alone so deep the thought L. & S.P. ((((you)))) The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. |
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Alwye
Moderator
Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850In the space between moments |
Stunning, Meadowmuse. I too love poetry written with an ocean theme. Lovely work, as always. *Krista Knutson* "Every moment marked with apparitions of your soul...." ~*Sarah McLachlan- Do What You Have To Do*~ |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Thanks to all who read and responded. I'm grateful that this work touched someone in something of a positive way. Claire |
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Eloise Senior Member
since 1999-11-27
Posts 1096Wyoming |
Claire, I do enjoy reading all of your work. I don't alway have the time to respond, but all of your work is so outstanding. And this is another example of excellence |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Clair, I love it, I love it, I love it. Parker |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Claire~ Again you've tendered a work of art. Stunning. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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christies heart Member
since 1999-08-10
Posts 189NJ, USA |
Meadowmuse, This is a powerful and wonderful poem. Thank you so much for sharing that with me in response to my poem. You paint a clear picture and I read this poem several times. Maybe it is my own experiences and the meaning I see in this poem, but I do not feel peace. And I don't get the feeling that peace is the intention. I see the hope and the ever-so-slow growth of a soul who wants to find such peace. This put together so many themes and struggles that really touch me. Thank you so much for sharing. I would like to also share an older post (which I will post agian here) with you. It is called "She Carried Dolls". Again, this poem is inspiring and evokes a variety of feeling...Christie Grant that I may not judge my niegbor until I have walked a mile in his moccasians Native American prayer |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I read with heartache this poem about sexual abuse, perhaps someone you know. It is a difficult subject, but you write it so beautifully, and I have no doubts that you would. Liz |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Eloise...Thank you, and please don't worry about not responding to my work. I also read more than I am able to respond to, and I imagine most folks here do the same. There is so much exceptional poetry shared on this board every day, one cannot possibly respond to every piece (and still have a life!). I'm glad you enjoyed this one, Eloise. Parker...thank you, thank you, thank you! Marge...and again, I must thank you for reading. Your words are much appreciated. Christie...yes, you have interpreted this poem very perceptively. I did not intend for the end to seem like a "happily ever after" by any means. Instead, I wished to show that there is a degree of hope present, but that my healing is, indeed, a long, slow and difficult struggle of self, and something that can only be realized by giving the little one inside time and space to trust. Thank you, so much, for reading this and responding not only here, but with your "She Carried Dolls." I was able to read it earlier this morning, and did respond, but then had to get away for a bit, into the fresh air, to remind myself that what is "now" is not what was "then." Peace in healing to you, Christie, and thank you. Liz...thank you, and yes, it is about someone I know...myself. I'm glad you were touched by this piece, Liz. Thanks for reading it. Claire |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Claire this is an excellent piece of writing. You, too, deal with your emotional pain very well in your writing! Denise |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
You have reflected on such an uncomfortable and bitter happening with such grace! I admire the care you are taking with writing on such a powerful subject. It shows your strength. |
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christies heart Member
since 1999-08-10
Posts 189NJ, USA |
Claire..Just one more thing..before I get back to the now.. I think it says so much of your own strength and healing the way you can are able to speak openly, without any of the so often present, but unthinkable shame that often comes with the start of healing. It shows me you have had a long road behind you and you most certainly are able to live mostly in the present. Very important for me to..  (for the present) |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
The first verse took my breath away... I don't have it back yet... this kind of power has "been there" written all over it... wow! |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Denise...writing is definitely an important outlet for me. Thank you so much for your kind response. Martie...it is a strength that I have fought to attain, and sometimes still have to remind myself that I have. Thank you for reading my work and for such a nice response. Christie...thank you. Living in the present is a daily challenge for those of us who have spent so much time hiding in the shame and shadows of our past. Some days are better than others, but still we must face forward, if we can. In coming to terms with the horror of the past, you must allow yourself the gentle but firm grasp of a healing hand from within the here and now...your own. Take care, and face forward...Claire Suthern...I'm glad you were touched by this, but sorry about your breathing! Thanks for reading.Claire |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
"Whose secret prayers and lullabyes could never so much as be heard, though that child, always silent, knew each syllable of every word. And the sometimes when she trusts enough to hold her close to me, are the times I breathe against her and I feel her feel the sea. And the sands are dry and warming now and urging us to start building castles, true and towering, along the beaches of our heart." this poem is amazing and deeply touching... I came here today in search of it...due to words of another admirer of it...im sorry i missed it before...I hope you dont mind me bringing it back up...thank you for sharing your wisdom and pain. I respect your courage and honesty. take care, janet marie ...there are places inside all our souls... that have never been touched... there are places inside our hearts... that need to be loved this much... Janet Marie *I miss you baby... I love you, always.* |
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Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
High marks for the poem and the person who wrote it. I can only echo the praises written above. Very nice, Danny |
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