Open Poetry #6 |
Finished version of...Soceity |
Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
Have you ever wondered why this day people feel alone? Is it because of our society's underlying tone? They say, "don't kill or take a poor soul's life" but then they fill our pockets with a gun and razor knife. They say size doesn't matter, we all are equal and free, but why everytime when I open "People" there is a model who wears size 3 They say that caring for your kids is what we do but then we see children with bruised eyes and a heart in two! They say teen's are fine, and by life's rules they abide but we see some filled with so much pain that they commit suicide We say they'll stop smoking if we up the age to 18 to sell a smoke but yet every minute a 10 year old will take a puff and choke We decided if schools passed out condoms, babies wouldn't come but yet pregnancy in teens is on a high for some *It's time to stop believing in all the things they say And view the world with open eyes as it exists today. The changes must come from within from folks like me and you And then perhaps the things they say may possibly come true. *Balladeer's ending [This message has been edited by Blondie (edited 04-11-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Melissa - All Rights Reserved | |||
hsystems Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 319Murray, UT, USA |
Blondie - very nice poem! Maybe you could sum it up by saying something to the effect that the world is filled with hypocrisy, but we can change it - one person at a time - with our own actions. Troy Beautiful, Thought-Provoking Poetry http://www.h-systems.net/p1.htm |
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Cutie Putootie Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 54Ohio |
I don't have an idea for an ending but Melissa this is a great poem, I hope some of the Passion friends can help though. "If you live to be a hundred, I want to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you." |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
I don't think there is an ending for this poem, cause every one of the things mentioned are very much still going on. I think this poem is a perfect display of our society, just the way it is....(my opinion) Jeffrey |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
THANKS FOR THE REPLIES SO FAR...I don't know how to end it though still |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
It's time to stop believing in all the things they say And view the world with open eyes as it exists today. The changes must come from within from folks like me and you And then perhaps the things they say may possibly come true. |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
Oh wow balladeer I must say I love this ending, let's see what others got and then I guess I can take my pick |
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weaubleau Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 101MO |
wonderful poem... balladeer's ending is so fitting! sounds incredible together! |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Blondie~ Your poem with Balladeer's ending ... says it perfectly. At least that's what I think. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Great poem, Blondie! I also like Balladeer's ending! Denise |
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Jeffrey Carter
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367State of constant confusion! |
I changed my mind Balladeer wrote the perfect ending to this Jeffrey |
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Blondie Member
since 1999-08-06
Posts 307Ohio |
Ok...then Balladeer's ending is it thanks good ole' balladeer |
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