Open Poetry #6 |
What Do You see......... |
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Look into my eyes, the window of my soul. The place I tell no lies, the place that I am whole. Do you see silent cries, of the horrors untold. The pain of the lies that cause me to withhold. Do you see the fears that I've never let go. The unshed tears, that my cheeks will never know. Do you see the child I keep hiding in the the darkness. She only escapes in my sleep when I am defenseless. Do you see the chains that hold me down. Do you see the pains within which I drown. Do you dare to see all that is true? Or do you turn from me because of what you hide in you. |
||
© Copyright 2000 Butterflies_dont_cry - All Rights Reserved | |||
Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
This is so wonderfully written. So sensitive and revealing. "the window of my soul". "do you see the child i keep" I also like the structure and rhyme. nicely done. |
||
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
This is intense...I see a woman reaching out for love and understanding. James |
||
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
WOW, an awesome feeling came there at the end! I like it! |
||
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Danny and P.S. thank you for your views and for sharing them with me. James, You may know me better than I know myself. |
||
Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
HI to Butterfly... welcome to passions...this is an emotionally strong and excellent poem. I just read your first post as well, your poems are VERY touching, I relate to the pain expressed in your words...I hope you find the healing in writing that I do. Come visit us over in Dark Passions... and may I say you have such great taste in your ICON choice(smile) take care, janet marie ...every moment of every day... your still with me in every way. every poem and song... every rhyme and verse... your still here...like a beautiful curse. janet marie |
||
Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
My God, is this an amazing poem. I am at a loss for words, simply because your poem is that good and emotional. This poem hit home very hard, it's like you knew about my life and wrote it for me. Wow! Take care, Melissa Honeybee |
||
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Melissa and Janet, Thank you both, I open my soul when I write and let the poem form itself so I really can't take the credit, I am only the tool to release the pain and hopefully heal in the process. When I write it gives me a chance to escape and in a sense to forget. I'm glad that you have been touched and I'm sorry that you have shared the same pain that lives within me. |
||
busylisa_ca Junior Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 39 |
Insightful poem. Wow, I don't know what to say other than thank you for sharing such graceful writing busylisa |
||
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Busylisa, I send thanks in return for allowing me to share my poems with someone other than myself I can only hope that they can touch others as I have been touched by the poetry I have read here. |
||
hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
"Or do you turn from me because of what you hide in you." Insightful...we all hide some things inside and what we see in others is often directionally proportional to what we see in ourselves. Nice job Welcome to passions |
||
Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
This is an exceptional, expressive piece of writing, Butterfly. As for its content, I feel as though I know where you're coming from, perhaps. It's so difficult to keep that child in darkness, and sometimes even more difficult to allow her out. I have a poem here somewhere called "Forever Out" that addresses this subject, as well as many very gifted writers here who have written on the subject of accepting and loving one's inner wounded child. It can be a wonderful healing release, expressing your issues through poetry. Keep writing! ~ Claire |
||
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Hoot and Clair, Thank you so much for welcome to passions and also your words of praise mean so much, in reading your own breathtaking poetry I'm honored that you liked mine. |
||
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
I'll add my welcome here, (ask everyone, I'm always late.) Once again we come to the masques which people wear. In this you depict quite aptly the facade (we) wear in the presence of others. But you've also braved the waters and extrapolated it to show that oft times when we shade what lurks inside ourselves, we can also blind our sight to the beauty inside others. A veritable two-edged sword, seldom wielded properly. It's a shame to miss out on the wonders of another's soul, simply because we're so unsure of the glory of our own. Well wrought poem here, applause from this corner of the assylum. |
||
EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
Annother fabulous piece. Your work is open, honest, and full of feeling.I hope you will share more of your work. It seems that we write for similar reasons, a form of escape. To open your soul and let the feelings flow I think is the only way. |
||
First__Knight Senior Member
since 1999-11-08
Posts 678 |
To be so open and giving in such verse is that of a true soul of sharing. What a expression of sharing while in the end you bring out the want and the need of the sharing of the one of whom you speak. Done with elegance and style. Bring me more please There are two kinds of pedestrians...the quick and the dead. Drive it like you stole it. |
||
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
This is beautiful. Your poetry speaks straight from the heart...leaves quite an impact. I feel that maybe there is an innocent child somewhere in me too at times...only daring to come out in dream...This poem was powerful to me - but the last line most of all...wow! A wonderful work. michael |
||
Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Christopher, Eagle_One, First_Night and Michael, First of all let me say that I am not lumping you together as one for you each expressed individual views that made me so happy, not that you gave me praise because that is not why I write, but that you found something in this poem that you enjoyed and that made you feel common ground with it and with the feeling that surrounded it. Thank you each for sharing your thoughts with me and making me feel welcome...if you only knew what that meant. |
||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Butterflies~ your words come straight from your heart and touch mine. Wonderful poem! -SEA |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |