Open Poetry #6 |
Deeply |
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Missing you will never < !signature-->Depart from me Still my core cries for you To live To be Missing you still hurts So deeply within Deep in this bottomless sea My soul Still longs To know Your voice Your touch Your love Missing you Forever Binds us As one Together Denise And slight is the sting of his trouble Whose winnings are less than his worth; For he who is honest is noble, Whatever his fortunes or birth.~~~Alice Cary, ~Nobility~ [This message has been edited by dsnyder (edited 03-06-2000).] |
||
© Copyright 2000 Denise - All Rights Reserved | |||
hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Denise...this is very beautiful. It's great to see you writing free verse and very well I might add |
||
Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
WOW Denise, this is deeply beautiful! Loved every line! Well Done! What comes from the heart goes to the heart. Samuel Coleridge |
||
January Flowers Member
since 2000-02-01
Posts 209South Carolina |
Presentation: A+ Message: even better than A+ Denise...this is wonderful. Simple, but not, which happens to be my absolute favorite kind! Poems like this are so versitile to me, and the meaning can change with a "blink" of my mood...I really enjoyed this. It's a keeper! |
||
Honeybee Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372Ontario, CANADA |
Denise: A beautiful and bittersweet poem. This piece really hit hard because I am in this situation right now. Thanks for writing this. Take care, Melissa Honeybee |
||
Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Denise~ I also like the free-falling verse of this one. So nice read. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
||
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Alright Denise! Very nicely done! |
||
Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Beautiful words Denise. I could feel everyone of them... Michael |
||
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Intensity of emotion at its best, Denise... Nice job, my friend.. [This message has been edited by Nan (edited 03-03-2000).] |
||
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Beautiful writing, Denise. |
||
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
How lovely! This really flowed! I like it. |
||
RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
very beautiful Denise.....I can feel this |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thank you everyone! You all make me feel good about my first free verse poem! I'm glad you all liked it! Denise |
||
Cypher Junior Member
since 2000-02-19
Posts 17 |
Beautiful. Enjoyed this one a lot. It's quite different from your usual. Very pretty. -Cypher |
||
tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
Denise I'm in awe of you, if this is your first free verse all I can say is that YOU ROCK.... Keep all the windows of your mind open Anne Rooks |
||
tulip Member
since 1999-07-04
Posts 320unknown |
Denise, I love this one. You know the more deeply we love, the deeper we fall when it ends...why does it have to work that way? |
||
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Denise this is so sad to have someone that you care for so much...their voice, their touch, and their love, and now they are gone. I went thru a very dark period in my life when I knew that I must release someone that I was very attached to...for her sake...and for my own sanity. I could imagine in my mind that I was holding on so tight that my claws were digging into her. I knew that I must release her and I have...but it took me a long time to reach that place...and it was one of the hardest things I ever did but also one of the easiest. James |
||
Nurse Crachet Member
since 1999-09-27
Posts 318They know where I am! |
You did a wonderful job on this, I really like it. |
||
Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Hey, Denise! Prose and free verse! WOW! You are quite the writer. And all well done. This is beautiful Liz |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thank you all for your lovely kind commments! I'm glad that you all liked it! Denise |
||
RufffRyder Member
since 2000-02-25
Posts 143<------Over There------> |
Your writings always leave me wanting to write another myself. This is yet another great display of your talent. Thank you for the read dsnyder |
||
Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Just beautiful, Denise. So well expressed. ~ Claire |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thank you, RufffRyder and Claire! I'm glad you enjoyed it! Denise |
||
bboog Member
since 2000-02-29
Posts 303Valencia, California |
Denise: I liked this poem but feel that it's missing something. A simile perhaps? For example: "deeper than outer space" or "deeper than the blackest sea"? Hope this is helpful to you. bboog |
||
Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Poignant and beautiful, Denise! Corinne |
||
Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
very beautiful denise...sigh |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thank you for reading and commenting, bboog, Corinne, and Corazon! It is always appreciated! I'm glad you liked it! bboog-I changed it a bit, is that better? |
||
WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Well, I'm at the end of something beautiful and all that's left to do is ditto all the wonderful comments here. They're all true ya know! |
||
Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Denise, very beautiful, a poem with a deep connection for you. Thanks for sharing. Parker |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thank you, Rebecca and Parker for reading and commenting. I'm glad you liked it! Yes, Parker, a deep connection. I'm glad you could feel it! Denise |
||
Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
This is, Denise, most nicely done! Thanks for giving me the link...hugs. K 'Writing sharpens life; life enriches writing' Sylvia Plath |
||
First__Knight Senior Member
since 1999-11-08
Posts 678 |
Awesome.....very moving There are two kinds of pedestrians...the quick and the dead. Drive it like you stole it. |
||
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Thanks Kamla, I'm so glad that the Queen of Free Verse liked this! I'll be on the look out for your sonnet! I know it will be great! David, thanks for your always kind words! Denise |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |