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A home without a wall, |
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| How to Join | Member's Area | Private Library | Search | Sanctuary | Login | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Main Forums | Discussion | Tech Talk | Mature Content | Archives |
A home without a wall, |
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| Open Poetry #6 |
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Rivers upon the glass |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Shadows deepen as the rain softly dissolves against the glass like displaced water color Branches tap quietly in time to a desolate wind whispering of distant dreams Her face one with the glass the coolness soothing upon her cheek as she watches the rain Soft sighs spread like tiny white trails across the pane fading quickly like forgotten moments soon replaced by others doomed to the same fate Her eyes search the darkness each heart beat brings the dawn closer Bewildered shadows fall to her feet love dying within the rivers upon the glass.. I love the time and in between the calm inside me in the space where I can breathe... Sarah McLachlan |
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| © Copyright 2000 Denise Blackwell - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
oh, I know this picture....really great writing...you paint your words well poet friend |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Breathe, What a beautiful poem, I have done this very thing, pressing against the window pane and watched the water run down. Thank you, Cerenity |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
What a neat way to describe a reflective (small pun intended) moment like this. Lovely writing. ~ Claire |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Corazon That is the ultimate compliment..coming from you...  Cerenity I find it soothing...I love the rain... Meadowmuse Thank you... I love the time and in between the calm inside me in the space where I can breathe... Sarah McLachlan |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Breathe, this is just stunning. Been there many times myself...I could actually feel the coolness of the glass. Beautiful portrayal. |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Breathe~ Your work keeps getting lovelier and lovelier. I like the softness of the rain as it slips down the window pane. Is there a woman who has not 'been' there? Nope, don't think so ... thanks for painting the moment so well. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautiful writing, Breathe! This is excellent! Denise |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
"fadded quickly like a forgotton moment", lovely lines. Wonderful poem |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
Great poem Breathe~ I have sat and stared at a window pane during a rainy day, and I find it rather soothing, although at the same time a little saddening. It is a good time to sit and reflect on life |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
What a wonderful poem, I love poems about the rain, the meloncholy puttering sound against the roof or window. It does conjure up a certain sadness. This mixed with your poetic talents wrought a poem of the highest caliber. Liz |
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Breathe~ Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 315Washington... |
Thank you all...  )Martie...somethings fade...while others remain for a lifetime.. )Marge...as usual...your comments warm my heart... Serenity...you are too kind...thank you! Mistikman...I like your perception...reflections of life...think I may retitle this...*g* Elizabeth...a true compliment coming from you...Thank you... Denise...last but never least...thank you too!... I love the time and in between the calm inside me in the space where I can breathe... Sarah McLachlan |
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RufffRyder Member
since 2000-02-25
Posts 143<------Over There------> |
Breathe~this is a very nice piece here. I can visualize every word that you`ve written. Thank you for the read Breathe |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
This was a wonderful poem, ~Breathe. Exceptional ending. Loved it. Michael |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Just wonderful!! Well done |
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January Flowers Member
since 2000-02-01
Posts 209South Carolina |
OH! This is super! I W A S that girl with her face pressed up against the cool glass...your words put me right there, feeling everything I read. Sigh. You have done a great job in this writing, Breathe! I'm envious of your talent for putting such a "happening and thought" into such perfectly descriptive words. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Nicely done... I enjoyed muchly. |
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