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Open Poetry #5
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Don't Ever Argue With Lorelei
| Open Poetry #5 |
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Don't Ever Argue With Lorelei |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
LongJohn was arguing with Lorelei, A task he couldn't win, Of course ya know men always try, But we know we never can. They were arguing over love-making, LongJohn said "Men enjoy it more, Why do you think we're always hot, It's something we adore." Lorelei just shook her head, And said, "Now listen here, I'll prove to you that you are wrong, And as dumb as Balladeer!" "If you have an itch, In your middle ear, And ya stick your finger in, And scratch it every where, And when you've finally finished, And pull out your finger 'dear', Which one feels better, Your finger or your ear?" |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
huh? huh? what did I do? I guess I will just leave this one be and let LJA comment! Hey Toe..how far do you live from Chatanooga? We gonna finally get to meet you in the spring? |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
Thanks for the warning Toe. I shall be sure not to agrue with her.  Hey the advice she gives is sound. She is a smart woman....although she did marry the Sailor....hmmm I guess love is blind...lolNo offense to either Lorelei or Sailor with that comment.  |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
yep....looks like it...about 2 hours if I recall?..... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I waited so long for a chance to post, I forgot what I'd wanted to say! LOL. Geesh... don't servers understand that thinking is hard enough for me without impediments? LOL! Loved the poem, sweets!!! And I do have to agree with Lor's assessment of the situation. LOL. But I don't share Marilyn's unwillingness to offending the sailor *G*... so I will question SOME of Lor's decisions! LOL |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
I'm so often asked why I married this man, I wish I could put it to poetry...but I'm not that talented, but I tell you from my heart..He's funny, he's smart and and has a great big....heart!!! (he has manners too, but that would be bursting his image, so I'll just tell it quietly) What else could a gal ask for? |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
suthern....'Tis Lorelei I don't want to offend. I have been forewarned by sir Toe here. Sailor...well I took a poke at him when I initially came to the board and I have survived the fray...lol. I do not know these fine folks that well and I would hate to be taken in the wrong way. Once I get to know her better I might be more inclined to let the jokes fly. |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
I don't think ya could have found a better one Lor.....honestly....and yanno?...He done purddie good himself.... |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Last time I ever listen to Toerag... Stuck my finger in my wife's ear and she hauled off and hit me... then she said, after 28 years, you still ain't got it right. Thanks a lot Mr. ToeRag sir.... Sincerely, Mike |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
I'm so sorry Mike.....it was a typo..honest....I left off the "R" in ear?....Please forgive me.....LOL |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
OMG, Mike - that is one of the funniest posts I've read in a long time - lmao@haven't got it right - that was great! Marilyn... Now that I know who yer M-in-law is, dontcha think you oughta be jest a tad cautious? hmmmm? Yanno, she's just a woman, and I have my manly ways to lord over her - just a friendly warning....heh heh heh LngJhnAg <----- hasn't got a clue psst, Marilyn - any time you want to take a shot at me, please feel free to have fun... I'll probably laugh harder than anybody else, and I promise to not take your comments seriously - we are all friends in here, and who better to have as a bantering partner? As for old Toerag - yanno, Toe - that was a pretty nice compliment, pardner - thanks Lorelei (my love) - yanno, you CAN lie in here about my physical attributes - really, nobody will doubt the veracity of your claims... please?... just a little white lie?... *feeling puny now* |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
Puny? I have a feeling you have not been "puny" in many mnay years my lover...and did I say anything about your attibutes? I think you are put together quite nicely...and we sure fit arm in arm |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
LongJohn.....I can't believe ya named "it"...?????...Geesch, I aint' named mine in years! When I did, I called it "forearm of the hulk"....and you named your's "puny?"....That's interesting....If the name fits.....where it?....LOL....but really, ya should quit "feeling" it at work, someone might think you're taking a put put golf pencil home down your pants...... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFL @ Mike getting it right and LJA not having a clue... and ROFLMAO @ naming it puny!!! You guys have turned a lousy Friday afternoon of work and frustration into a "hide behind my file cabinet and giggle" kind of day.... Thank you!!!! |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
... and you had all this fun while I was trying to teach a miscreant 10yr old kid how to multiply???? |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Obviously written by a man very knowledgeable about fingers in the ears....and I can't believe Lorelei would call Balladeer dumb....we've had some great dimes together!!  |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
LOL... funny stuff all the way around and down... really can't stop laughing. |
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Mike Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462 |
Dear Mr. Toerag sir: Do you perchance know where I can get a good used set of crutches? I will make this brief as it is hard to type with one hand. Are you sure you said "r"? Sincerly, Mike (any replies may be sent to the emergency room) |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
ROFL.... Like the poem...like the thread!! |
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Lorelei54 Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458 |
Call Deer' dumb??? never!!! Where did you get that idea? And yes, I agree that we have had some great "dimes" together...perhaps we should go in seach of them again? |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Hey, Lorelei, I've got enough cents not to turn that offer down!! (with LGA's approval, of course) |
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poetFemmeFatale Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646Arkansas |
LMAO at all this stuff, but laughing the hardest at Mike for all his mishaps! LOL Here's a story for you Mike....uh....when I was 2, I stuck my finger in an electrical outlet...shocked the hell out of me all the way up my arm! Never did it again!! You'll learn these things with age I suppose....Uh...how old are you anyway? **sigh Guess you're just a late bloomer! hehe Stop sticking your fingers in places they don't belong! ROFLMAO 'Toe will only get you in trouble! NEVER listen to him!! (sending flowers to e-room)  You're too funny man!** I'm reaching for the brightest star I've ever seen - knock my ladder out from under me, and you'll wish you hadn't !! -pFF ** Here's to 2000! |
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