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Open Poetry #5
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Lynn Burdette
Junior Member
since 1999-11-23
Posts 25
Greensboro, Georgia ( I'm a Georgia peach!)

0 posted 2000-01-15 10:10 PM



Coals burning in a fire,
Reminds me of love I once desired.
Burning, burning I will not forget,
The love I experienced, I came to regret.

My heart, was broken only by you,
Like a rose that was torn into.
The pain I felt in my chest,
was very strong I must confess.

The fun we shared, the laughs, the bliss,
I really wish I didn't miss.
The words we'd said, the things we'd done,
I only wish had never begun.

So, the flames in my soul will someday go out.
I know it for sure without a doubt.
Because those flames will be replaced,
By someones touch, love and embrace.

For now I will wait quietly by the fire,
with the burning of the love I once desired.
< !signature-->

 Lynn Burdette

[This message has been edited by Lynn Burdette (edited 01-15-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Lynn Boivin - All Rights Reserved
Astraea
Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 378
California! Yeah! Okay, I'm done now
1 posted 2000-01-15 10:14 PM


How lovely...and beautifully spoken.  Very nice.

~Astraea

 "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness."

"Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things."


Paul Hoekman
Member
since 1999-12-28
Posts 382
Harwinton Ct. U>S>A>
2 posted 2000-01-15 10:38 PM


I'm burning up
over here!

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2000-01-15 11:50 PM


Lynn-

Take a bow ..
this is stunning.

~*Marge*~

 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-01-15 11:50 PM


Lynn-

Take a bow ..
this is stunning.

~*Marge*~

 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
5 posted 2000-01-16 08:27 AM


Lynn I liked this very much. Wonderful title and it kept on burning.   James
John Yaws
Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 860
Texas
6 posted 2000-01-16 09:42 AM


Beautiful poem, lovely sentiments. The piece was well crafted. One suggestion, if I may? In verse three, line four, would replacing "never" with "not" smooth out a slight catch? No offense, and not ctiticizing...lovely work.
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