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Critical Analysis #2
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crossroads blues
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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crossroads blues |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest 
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Throwing myself on your mercy and asking for your very best critique and suggestions. Robert Johnson keeps riding me and will not leave me in peace. It is not as if everyone knows who he is and I wonder what is the purpose? Or is there a purpose, except, perhaps, to indulge myself and my love for his work? crossroads blues I went down to the crossroad fell down on my knees I went down to the crossroad fell down on my knees Asked the lord above “Have mercy now save poor Bob if you please” ~Robert Johnson did’ya ever wonder what he looked like I mean really looked like when he sold his soul to the devil were his eyes deep brown bloodshot rheumy or were they lit fiery silken gripped by desire did’ya ever wonder how he did it at 61/49 I mean did he kneel slowly or throw himself in the dust did he crawl as a demon serpent his tongue split lashing did his hands grab dirt body flashing did’ya ever wonder how his fingers felt I mean really felt on frets that belonged in hell how his voice left his body carrying delta dirt and gravel guts did it scratch all the way or slip whiskey woman smooth did’ya ever wonder how it felt I mean really felt when the devil collected when he lifted that glass drank his debt laid up yonder in the bed 3 days in baptist town waitin’ did’ya ever wonder how he left here cryin’ quiet for his wife and baby or totin' his demon guitar blues hangin’ on his wry lips cursin’ the devil you know that man didn’t leave this earth like the rest of us do did’ya ever wonder |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
Put punctuation in and proper sentences. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
thank you so much for your suggestion rhia I actually never use punctuation or sentences in my poetry I am more concerned with the content and significance here |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
Whether to punctuate or not? It's a good question. I read this yesterday and found the opening repetition to work well. While I suspect more people know about Johnson than you suspect, I haven't had time to do any quick searching yet. One of the things I wanted here, rightly or wrongly, was a description of the man himself. I'm pretty sure I've seen a picture of him and that would add another layer of mystique to this piece. For others, if you have a blues tune (acoustic, perhaps even a poor recording, and one of the old, old pieces though it doesn't have to be Johnson himself) playing in the back of your head, it helps come to grips with the rhythm she's shooting for here. I liked it I just wish you let your imagination fly a little more. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
thank you so much Brad I do, in fact, have a picture and a short biography which I would post with the poem. I began by quoting Johnson's "Crossroad Blues." Do you mean post a sound recording too? Perhaps you are absolutely right and I do need to let my imagination fly more... maybe that's why I am so unsure about this piece. |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
Actually, no. I think a poem should try to capture the 'sound' of a song without actually listening to the song itself (it was in the back of my head). Also, I was thinking more along the lines of describing him in the poem itself, not simply displaying the picture. If we're talking about the same photo or something very similar, that could very well overwhelm the piece itself. It's a powerful picture and one that lends itself to poetic imagery. Oh, one more thing, when I referred to opeing lines I didn't mean the song quote, I meant the beginning of each stanza. This worked though, in a different piece, I don't think it would. Sorry about the misunderstanding. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
Yes! Now I understand! Thank you so much! |
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