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Critical Analysis #2
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Reflections
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Reflections |
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cbautista Junior Member
since 2006-09-13
Posts 38 |
Seconds tick down Into minutes, wafting down Into hours, flowing down Into a day, dribbling down Into the sunset, sinking low Up rises the virginal moon Into vast empty skies Trickling back into the horizon Where the twin awakens Rays soaring into open fields Of blue And all the while... Seconds ticks down Into minutes, wafting down Into hours, flowing down Into days then dribbling down Into the sunset sinking low Along the horizon. Again, any criticism is welcome. |
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| © Copyright 2006 Catherine Bautista - All Rights Reserved | |||
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
i liked this. very different than what i am used to reading. i think it could be longer though. the words were very contrasted i guess. but this is too short i think. and it doesnt mention reflections very much, so maybe a change in title also |
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cbautista Junior Member
since 2006-09-13
Posts 38 |
I will work on it then, though I was trying to go for a short poem effect of more word reflection than anything but I see what you mean. I will play around with it and see what I come up with, your input is greatly appreciated. |
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